August 17th, 2010

A Note To Joe Hart (And His Pants)

Dear Joe,

After your decision to completely decimate our offices with your brazen car park trouser switch, we really have been left with no choice.

We will need some time, (and perhaps shock therapy), to regain control of our minds. Once we are able to go more than five minutes without squealing, “Joe Hart in his pants!” to random passersby, you are going straight to the top of the Finest 5 consideration list.

Our people will contact your people.*

Love, Kickette.

*By shouting at them as they drive quickly away whilst speed-dialing the police.

UPDATE: Dear reader J sent us this. Have you seen?

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54 Responses to “A Note To Joe Hart (And His Pants)”

  1. joanna hart says:

    joe hart is so sexy!!!

  2. Mhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmm

    That's Nice :)

  3. T says:

    Wow look at those yummy hairy legs and that lovely tight arse.

    Oh I would over and over again,he is devine.

  4. ^^K^^ says:

    Joe Hart should've been in the F5 aaaaages ago. The guy has SUCH a cocky-sexy vibe. The guy has got balls, I mean how many goalies do you see stepping up to take penalties for their country like Joe Hart did at the under 21 Euros last year?

  5. Nando_Lover09 says:

    The second picture is just scrumptious.. :D

  6. mamicita says:

    …. …. precious ;)

  7. raluca says:

    sorry girls, but i get to see something like this every day. My husband's butt is the stuff of dreams. He played football as a junior in a club, too. smart, fabulous butt and does the laundry. life is bliss.

  8. Pam says:

    Me like Hart. First by his impresssives saves against Spurs, and now I’m liking him -with or without pants on. I like his confidence in being able to strip infront of the cameras. sexy man.

  9. mila_casillas says:

    The striped pants are so cute ;)

  10. Johanna says:

    LOL Cute

  11. C16 says:

    Oh yeah!!!!!!! ;)

  12. Heather says:

    this massively brightened up my second day of law school… although not entirely appropriate for in class viewing as it was hard to keep my giggling quiet

  13. Amandinha says:

    who cares about his underpants? Look at that ASS! I’m in love!

  14. aps says:

    I love how these footballers aren’t afraid to go nekkid in public. I’m really starting to love joe hart.

  15. Jamtart Heart says:

    Lovely! I was ready for a brief distraction from the sometimes overly smooth legs of la Liga players, haha, and here is Joe Hart, all stripey and appropriately furry. Variety IS the spice of life, so they say…

  16. Rosey says:

    Nice booty!! ;)

  17. aristeia says:

    Joe Hart, I nominate you for best week ever.

  18. Alisha says:

    This is why I have always loved Joe Hart, cheeky attitude to go with his cheeky smile ;) I’m think he is fast approaching the top of my favourites list ;)

  19. MissEstonia says:

    Rivals aren’t supposed to be this attractive…or this nekkid in the car park. :O Good lord! He’s got a nice physique, there.

  20. Ofeily says:

    OK Joe. Now you’re mine with your zebra pants

  21. MeL says:

    Speechless.. .. ha ha ha

  22. JV says:

    He has a nice backside (excluding the Cat in the Hat manties) and I don't mind all the fur, but finest five consideration??? BEFORE Ramos, Pique, CR7 and Jesus Navas??? Shameful, Kickette, just shameful.

  23. imhereforthenando says:

    Dear Joe Hart,

    Your ass is what dreams (mine, at least) are made of. Keep up the good work, you legend.


  24. senora ramos says:

    nice, um, assets joe.

    (starts to think english footballers may have something after all)

  25. ish says:

    At least he wasn’t wearing anything too embarrassing under there.

    And he’s hot. The future of the England team is looking bright in that way at least lol

  26. Allana says:

    Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! These pictures make Tuesday so much more bearable!

  27. Elina says:

    WTF!!!!! Zebra underpants??? Seriously ??? OMG!! Think I’m gonna have nightmares tonight.

  28. jane says:

    oh my word joe hart in his pants and yes the video has been out for a while :) )and well kickette thank you for putting this pic on here. its nice to see those legs ;)

  29. Zinny says:

    Yes. I haven't seen an English baller that I found attractive for a long time. Take Vida off, por favor, but leave the Spaniards and Yoann! Sometimes, I wonder why Pique or El Ramos aren't on the FF though.

    • Zinny says:

      Oh and P.S. I am very into the striped man-panties. Joe Cole is hotness.

      • Zinny says:

        I MEANT JOE HART! Not Joe Cole. Jeez. I must be drunk.

        • gin_in_teacups says:

          I'm constantly getting their name wrong, even though I'm very clear on whose who. I think it's the one syllable last name that throws me.

          Also, agreed that he is yummy but Yoann and the Spanish shouldn't be removed for him. And if Vida is getting bumped, definitely The Ramos or Pique (or Jesus Navas) belongs up there instead.

  30. xoWinnie says:


    YES for ballers with hairy legs!

    SO SEXY!


    • Amandinha says:


      No offense to CR9. but I've been seeing his super smooth hairless legs for so long, I almost forgot how real men's legs looked like! Sooooooooooooooooooo sexyyy!!!!!

    • xoWinnie says:

      ikr! glad to know i'm not the only one!

      there's only so much one can take of smooth, tanned legs on a man! i love El Ramos, infinitely, but it really wouldn't bother me to see some hair on him somewhere BESIDES his head…which isn't even doing it for me atm!

      sometimes, a man like Joe needs to come along and shoe us what a real man looks like! ;) i mean, i don't wanna date Chewbacca or anything, but men with hairy legs are damn attractive!

    • xoWinnie says:

      p.s. HELL TO THE YES on the FF pitch!

      he can replace one of the blondies.

      either Nando or Vidic.

      i have no problem seeing either of them go :)

    • simone says:

      Agreed strange I love the hairy legs

  31. kat says:

    nice ass and nah…he should do some depilate first..

    love his boxer anyway.. ;)

  32. Liv says:

    It's so wrong it can naver be right; if nothing else do it in the CAR!

  33. Hairy legs and a tight ass . . . . . *thud*

  34. gin_in_teacups says:

    I can't stop looking at the ass. Joe you tease, I'd say it's not nice to show us what we can't have, but I suppose I'd rather this glimpse than nothing at all.

  35. Lisa says:

    with such an innocent face I didn't expect him to have those werewolf legs! Love the chain gang underpants.

    • Amber C says:

      Although the ass is tight, I cannot help but think…..does the hair go all the way up??? I don't mind body hair but one thing I cannot deal with is a hairy ass.

  36. Steph says:

    Nice way to start my Tuesday. :) haha. He's hot!

  37. Coffee says:

    I *love* the zebra pants. And what's inside.

  38. MissAcrossThePond says:

    After taking a minute I'm now questioning why his pants were off?

  39. starsarella says:

    forget the zebra pants that photo after. reer

  40. Blake says:


  41. I'd Rather Walk says:

    WTF!!!!! Ahahahahahahaha…….that is just wrong. OMG….so NSFW.

  42. Blair says:

    OH…MY…GOD!! There just aren't words…