February 7th, 2008
Beck Talk: Private Sessions & Boyzilians
Madonna hosted a private fundraiser last night to benefit UNICEF and Malawi orphans. The star-packed event had celebrities bidding on prizes in the name of charity – forget having a Gucci bag named after you for the lowly price of $70,000 – how much is an hour of one-on-one time with David Beckham worth?
Well, the boobalicious Salma Hayek decided that $350,000 for a private hour playing football with Becks was a bargain – she outbid Anna Wintour and Tom Cruise to take the prize. We’re thinking, 1. Totally worth it. We would assume David can provide a fairly decent standard of ‘private’ tuition in 60 minutes. And by fairly decent, we mean stupendous; 2. Victoria will make herself present for the privateness, surely. 3. Tom Cruise? Step off, mate.
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Manscaping, Kickettes. It’s here and it’s happening: Apparently David Beckham’s infamous Armani ad has given a name to the rise and popularity of ‘intimate waxing’ amongst men. They’re calling it The Boyzilian.
From the Guardian:
No one could confirm yesterday whether the former England captain had been operating some kind of “border control” or whether it was airbrushing that kept his pants line neat. But if he had been doing some DIY, for once he is not starting a trend, but following it. All over the country more and more men (gay and straight alike) are marching into beauty salons and demanding a “Boyzilian”, or as one Yorkshire-based salon bills it, “the Full Monty”. In other words, the complete or near-complete removal of hair in intimate areas using wax.
We’re not sure this is entirely new on the news front – we’ve heard many ballers are fans of this practice already, but any excuse to post that Armani ad again and we’ll take it.
Wow that picture of David Beckham is hot! How much for an hour alone with Him? <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/raspberry.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="raspberry" style="border:0;" /> It would depend on what we would be doing <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/wink.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="wink" style="border:0;" />
It's great that Madonna is doing so much for charity, she really is an inspiration. I'm looking forward to her new Sweet & Sticky Tour, I already have my tickets and can't wait!
This Lawrie looniness has to stop
‘Speaking of shaving, and Nicolas Anelka, it reminded me of the last time I saw Joleon Lescott. Somebody needs to have a word with him and perhaps suggest he give the Anelka look a try. I mean, WTF is up with his head?‘
Apart from the fact he looks like a Klingon?! I swear he was spawned on another planet
SNORK!!!!! Sarabee, I just snorked my tea all over my blouse. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" />
Crikey! Where im from a Full Monty means extra bacon and sausage in the morning.
This Lawrie looniness has to stop… the kid looks like he going to climb a watertown with a loader weapon at any minute and take out half the town. Not that I have any room to talk I suppose, I do love the G’Nev and I am pretty sure that de moonlights as a serial killer.
As for the manzilian (as LA calls it), some manscaping is important.. too much = bad, very bad. I can’t Keano, Jose or any manly man getting this done but then again we love them for that.
Gina, I totally agree with you! With some men, you just don’t care – you’d take them any day, hair or no hair. My Frankie is one of those men for me.
had i know i would have taken my AMEX right up and paid $350,001 and worried about paying it back after the lesson…grrr
haven’t they seen the 40 year old virgin?! “kelly clarkson!“
Oh Kickette you really do spoil us. I’ve been feeling very rough today but I think this little dose of Man Medicine has improved my health a lot!! Damn that man is fineee!!
And an hour with Becks?! Hmmm what could we do? How about a nice game of scrabble, ooohh the mind boggles……………………
TFO, have you seen the book ‘Lawrie Sanchez: The Northern Ireland Years’? I just picked it up. It’s not a bio or anything, just an account of his years with the national team…not that I’d know really, since I’ve only looked at the pictures! (pre-epicly cool glasses of course, but still) I meant to mention this in my last post, but those thoughts of John and Frank and their ‘time of waiting’ for me to join them…well, that did distract me just a bit. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/smile.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" /> Okay, so that same thing distracts me for large portions of every day, but anyway….
Thank you. oh thank you Kickette for exploiting the opp to re-post the pick. GREATLY appreciated.
I personally have been a fan of the Boyzilian for a few years now, but am willing to admit that Becks has taken my appreciation of it to the next level!
This man is GORGEOUS! He looks amazing in a suit, and in skivvies. I wish I had been at the gala – I’d have gone to a bidding war with Salma! No money be damned! I have good credit!!!
TFO- you posted again while I was typing! And now I am positively cackling. The neighbors are on the phone right now, I’m sure, ringing the boys in the white coats!
My security word is ‘maybe’. LOLOLOLOLOLOL
TFO, I am laughing so hard right now my neighbors are probably beginning to question my sanity, quite rightly! I must sheepishly admit that I was being selfish in my post with my joint consolation session consisting of myself, John, Frank and Lawrie (I was gonna be busy!), but this idea works for me as well! And perhaps John and Frank could console each other until I could get back to them! (Oh, come on- it’s that kind of day-we’ve already had the word ‘threesome’, someone has talked about doing Toni Terry, so let’s just go with the fantasies! lol)
Oh Lawrie…he wouldn’t know what had hit him by the time we were through with him. And I’ve always felt nothing consoles like a good b*** j**!!!
Yes, I agree with your assessment of pink ties. It’s a lovely shade of pink he’s wearing, too. I do hope you get to see him. As for the fantasies, mine usually involve him in a suit- I didn’t say *all*…ahem, parts of him remain in the suit at all times, though! Suits equal power. Power equals sexy. As for the glasses, well they’re sure to fall off anyway.
Good lord, I’m going to need *another* cold shower- my second one of the day, after the ‘Frank’s manly hairy parts’ post.
Oh, Elise, I just realized that you meant a joint consolation session with you, Frank, John and Lawrie. Not me. Just you. Now I’m embarrassed. So, backing out of the thread now, and going to make dinner. And um, never mind. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/embarrassed.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="red face" style="border:0;" />
I’ll see if I can catch him on Sky Sports News tonight. No glasses, eh? That wrecks havoc with my Lawrie Sanchez fantasy, you do know that, right? The one where he’s totally naked *except* for the glasses?
But I am so *down* with the consoling session, Elise. Count me in! I’ll cradle him to my bosom and tell him everything will be alright. You can rumple his hair and pat his bottom. And then we’ll switch. Lawrie, baby, we’re on our way!
Pink tie, eh? Oh I do like men who try a little pastel – pink, lilac – with a dark suit. It emphasizes their masculinity, don’t you agree?
Viiiivaaa M
TFO- I thought of you today. Lawrie Sanchez was on SKY talking about the current Northern Ireland squad. He was looking quite nice, with a pink tie, but sadly no glasses. I found, however, that I was just as excited to see him even without the coolest glasses in the world. I’ve been wondering what he’s been doing since he was sacked, and where he is, and how soon I could get there to console him….and whether or not this would interfere with consoling John and Frank…
perhaps some kind of joint consolation session could be arranged…. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/tongue_wink.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="tongue wink" style="border:0;" />
Love The Picture!
Speaking of shaving, and Nicolas Anelka, it reminded me of the last time I saw Joleon Lescott. Somebody needs to have a word with him and perhaps suggest he give the Anelka look a try. I mean, WTF is up with his head? Back on topic, I had a boyfriend who shaved…not his head…and I watched him do it one day while he was in the shower…shave, I mean…and it was one of the most unsexy things I’ve ever seen a man do. We are no longer together (he had loads of other issues…or maybe they were *my* issues with *him*).
Gina, I see your point, too- it’s not like I’d say no to John and Frank whatever their manscaping choice.
Georgina I, too, checked out your blog. Your comment on the 2nd about Dickov is enough to make me a fan for life!
I guess it’s an acquired taste for some. Trust me, I had my share of hairy men, some who maintained and some who didn’t. But I’ve had a clean man for a long time now and find nothing wrong with how it looks or feels. There are no little red bumps or veiny looking things. Just pure HEAVEN <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/tongue_wink.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="tongue wink" style="border:0;" />
Your man has to be ready for the commitment of being bare down there all the time! Oh and Gina, totally agree with you!!! <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/cheese.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="cheese" style="border:0;" />
“But reading this week's installment of Anelka's Amorous Adventures with reports of him "shaving down there" made me want to puke.“
It is an epidemic with athletes, I think. My nephew, who plays junior league hockey, was visiting me recently, and I heard him in the bathroom with his electric shaver on for what seemed like eons. When he came out, his face was still stubble. So, I came right out with it: Tim, what the hell are you shaving in there? And he was all blushes until he told me – all the guys on the hockey team do the manscaping, and it’s considered weird if you don’t.
And Georgina, we totally understand. I took a peak at your blog, by the way – very very cute!
Im shorry if thish is a bit garballed. I’ve dribbbbled on my keybord ……….
Becks, C-Ron, and Fabio Cannavaro can do whatever the eff they like. I would hit it repeatedly: hairy, waxed or otherwise.
But reading this week’s installment of Anelka’s Amorous Adventures with reports of him “shaving down there” made me want to puke.
Elise, we can all relate to the “I need to scrape that hair off my tonsils and how the f**k I do that without looking like I’m trying to make myself heave?“ moment. It’s not romantic.
I am not sure that C-Ron would go for the boyzillian. He strikes me as the “neatly trimmed triangle” type. Plus, he doesn’t seem to be too hairy anyway, unless he’s waxing the entire torso. He’s so smooooooooooooooth.
And yes, may I echo, that any line of hair that extends down the back and into the crack needs to be firmly dealt with. It’s not a matter of esthetics at that point, it’s one of hygiene.
Yes, but c9, the problem is, where do you stop? If you do the boyzillian thing – (I’m imagining George W. Bush here: “Dick, just how many *is* there in a boyzillian?“) – you have lovely hairy thighs, which we all agree are a necessity. And then, there this figurative no man’s zone, where all sign of life has been eradicated from the earth’s surface. Not a hair. And then, you travel over the no man’s zone, and you’re up at the abdomen, where the hair starts again. Which I think we all agree again is a lovely thing, if it’s not too furry. So, basically, you have a smooth, pink area, as smooth as a baby’s bottom, except with large wobbly bits hanging there. It’s just all too problematic, and makes me frown and want to lie down and have a nap.
All of you are so funny <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" />
But I have to disagree when it comes to the man pruning thing. I like my man clean down in a certain area. He can leave his legs hairy, but ….when I’m in a frisky mood at least I know I won’t be having anything stuck in my m&%$@ to worry about or in any other areas for that matter.
Now about the charity for a great cause, it would have been all out war between me and Salma, catfight and torn clothing would have been seen. hahahaha
Well I don’t know about a fight, but evil glares would have been passed back and forth <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/shade_smirk.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="cool smirk" style="border:0;" />
TFO- I think this may be one of the best places to share TMI, so go right ahead! Most of us have our own ‘possibilities’ anyway. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/wink.gif" width="19" height="19" alt="wink" style="border:0;" /> It makes me wonder about everyone else’s.
And I’m all about some man-love, but the idea of Tom Cruise getting sweaty with David Beckham…or even anywhere near him…or really just watching him on television…just freaks me out. (shivers)
And TFO, I’m with you on the manscaping thing. A little light pruning is okay, but as we’ve discussed with the legs issue, I want to see lovely manly hairy legs that I can follow all the way up over the lovely manly hairy thighs to the shorts with some confidence that what I imagine inside the shorts will be just as manly…which means some nice manly hair. I’m of course thinking of Frank as I’m describing this! And I must now go have a REALLY cold shower.
TFO-The Bush and Dick thing is making me laugh out loud! (if your jaw is one the floor, please see the above post!!! LOL)
c9- I hear you. That one hair trapped on the roof of your mouth that makes you sound like a sick cat trying to get it out…not good, but as TFO said, where do you draw the line? I don’t like it looking like a bush (seriously, no joke was intended in there anywhere) but I don’t like the ‘I’m starring in my first porno’ look either (which you just *know* C-Ron is sporting). A little discretionary waxing perhaps in the ‘truly posterior’ area…that, I’m all for. Probably treading into ‘definitely not PG territory’…….
OMG- my security word is ‘door’. No freaking way.
Fourth, you’re hilarious!!! I agree men should look like men and that means hair.I like slightly hairy chests though bushy animal-like back hair a definite no-no. A bit of minor pruning in the nether regions is good housekeeping but definitely not all waxed. Me no like the squishy veiney thing going on down there either….
I’m glad Salma won it. Salma is a Goddess, and I bet she knows a thing or two about football too. My SO digs her as well, and I think she’s the only woman with whom I would consider a threesome. (Sorry . . . TMI)
Somehow I can’t imagine Anna Wintour playing kick-about for an hour. (“David, darling, you actually want me to wear that loathsome pair of trainers?“)
And Tom Cruise . . . he just wants to get sweaty with David, let’s face it.
The waxing thing – sorry, <fingers in my ears> nananananananananananananana – it isn’t happening . . . it can’t be happening. Men of the world, FFS, act like MEN. MEN are hairy and that’s part of the package (no pun intended). Clean, soft, curly hair is lovely, and it hides all the brainy, pinkish, bumpy bits. Okay, a bit of work with some scissors if it’s threatening to spill out of your Speedos like a bougainvillea, but that’s IT.
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