May 8th, 2012

Borussia Dortmund: Pose Off With A Plate

Image: REUTERS/Ina Fassbender.

While proximity to naked footballers is our raison d’etre, we’d rather not be involved in the kind of stripped to the waist, beer hurling merriment that immediately follows a league win. There’s enough of that in the Kickette office as it is.

Borussia Dortmund understand this, so once they’d finished buffing the dents out, they held a celebratory Bundesliga trophy presentation dinner. From there, it seems, they then forced all the players and their respective partners to pose with the damn thing.

Let’s critique them. It isn’t as though we have anything better to do.

Distraction Technique #1: Mouth To Mouth Meandering

Sebastian Kehl and his girlfriend Tina (lead photo) show their love.¬†Or use a kiss to prevent onlookers from realising how much they’ve been enjoying the refreshments.

At least, that’s what we always do.

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Distraction Technique #2: The Hot Team Mate

Image: Martin Rose/Bongarts/Getty Images.

It’s not known whether Neven ‘Keown‘ Subotic was forced to stand next to Mitch Langerak while respective girlfs Teresa (l) and Riahannon Woods carried out plate holding duties, but we suspect that to be the case. You wouldn’t choose to be trapped in the wake of that hottie, would you?

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Distraction Technique #3: The “Awkward”

Image: DeFodi.de.

But perhaps engaging the services of a super hot teammate is a smart move if you’re as awkward at posing as Florian Kringe is. Luckily, Verena Mundhenke’s awesome colourblocking was on hand to do the honours while Mitch was busy elsewhere.

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Distraction Technique #4 : The Leaning Tower Of Sven

Image: REUTERS/Ina Fassbender.

Sven Bender is several feet taller than Simone Dettendorfer – an issue that a canny photographer will usually seek to rectify, for obvious reasons. This guy didn’t have time to go looking for a stool, however, and simply forced the chivalrous Sven to lean in. A lot.

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Distraction Technique #5: Hide It & Hope They Don’t Peek

Image: REUTERS/Ina Fassbender.

Mats Hummels and Cathy Fischer might have gotten a little too carried away in the buffet line, but no matter! The trophy’s wide circumference hides even the most unpleasant of stains.
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Upon reflection, we prefer the naked beer chucking. Anyone in the Kickette Army got a towel?

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6 Responses to “Borussia Dortmund: Pose Off With A Plate”

  1. zitronensorbet says:

    The name of Nevens girlfriend is Isabell. Teresa has brown hair and was with him last year.

  2. carmen says:

    Why didn't you put any photo of Robert Lewandowski? He's sooo cute :) And he has very beautiful and nice girlfriend as well!

  3. Loninha - Brasil says:

    And once again the fool's girlfriend tried to appear more Mats Hummels everyone!

  4. Jayy says:

    that trophy looks like a Spartan shield. Footballers in Spartan attire? *_*

  5. anna says:

    Awww… Sebastian and Tina look really cute together. Also, thanks for that towel link! :D

    I'd like to add a video of some naked trophy fondling (courtesy of Moritz Leitner, Mats Hummels and Kevin Großkreutz): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mitLws_4f8w#t=0m34…

  6. mrs benzema says:

    So happy 4 them but I can’t help but feel it should be bayern munich up there but I guess u win some u lose some