You think this is the second best view of a German player’s junk you’ve had this week? It’s nothing compared to the one the owner of that floating head has.
For more Kickette perversions of the English language, please revisit our Language Lunacy post from June last year. Happy days!
If an image of Mario Balotelli in close proximity to a powerful piece of machinery doesn’t scare the pants off you, you haven’t been following the news over the last twelve months.
But despite his penchant for explosions and high speed impacts with stationary objects, Mario’s recent adventures in the crystal clear waters of Ibiza ended well. The Italian managed to make some special new friends and kept his ‘ski on the ocean, rather than driving it across the beachfront to the local women’s prison.
Unfortunately, we can’t say the same for another international footballer.
We just can’t quit the ‘ballers on breaks right now, Kickettes. Is that so wrong of us?
Don’t answer that.
In light of yesterday’s rethinking of the Finest Five (thanks to Carlos), what do you all have to say about us potentially bumping Sergio up on our hottie totem pole?
Dahveed and fam are spending quality time on Ibiza. Well, they were until they caught a glimpse of Sergio’s tastefully trousered friend.
What else are candid pictures of footballers enjoying themselves on holiday for, other than to give rise to idle speculation and snap judgments by the likes of us?
We’ve got you off to a good start with this selection. Why not channel your envy into something positive too?