Since David Beckham officially told the world his plans to move to California and play for $1 million a week whilst basking in the attention of sun-tanned beach bunnies eager to fawn over his accent and thighs of thunder, we’ve been feeling a sense of ennui. A bittersweet feeling we can’t quite put our finger on.
We love that David will grace the American tabloids and the A-list party scene with his golden balls. We know the Americans won’t be able to resist his sizeable pocket money, his celebrity status and his looks.
Oh yeah, and the football.
We also think the Americans will welcome David and Victoria’s lifestyle with open arms and we won’t hear as much about his “brand Beckham” exploits as we do in the UK. Just the thought of seeing all those pap shots of Victoria shopping on Rodeo Drive and/or David always in shorts due to the climate has us in a tizy.
Yet something just doesn’t sit entirely right with us. Six months ago Becks was captaining his country in the World Cup and now he’s going to play for the LA Galaxy? Pardon? Real Madrid coach Fabio Capello has said David will not play again for the team, so we won’t even be seeing him on the pitch for several months.
Even though he’s got a big pay day and will bring a lot of attention to the sport in the US and Canada, it still seems like Mr. B is going out mediocre, not on top. And as you all know, dear Kickettes, we always prefer David on top.
*nudge nudge wink wink*
For now, we’ll have to settle for watching/rewinding this video 8 million times to the bit where he says, “that’s what excites me…“
Link: A Look At Beckham’s Career
Link: Real Madrid Leave Beckham Out In The Cold
Link: Beckham’s Escape to LA: The First Reaction
There are no words to describe this product. We’re not being sarcastic – the website selling this contraption isn’t in a language that our computer can recognize.
What we do know for sure is this: it’s a David Beckham chia pet.
You open the head, pour in the seeds, add water, and enjoy a lovely botanical treat for your home.
Being immortalised as a chia pet is a level of success rarely attained in life, no? We are witnessing something truly larger than life.
Now, let us never speak of this again.
Link: David Beckham Chia
Let us put aside the stupid ass half-untucked-shirt-trend people are trying to bring into favour and the shirt-unbuttoned-just-one-button-too-far and talk about the levels of hotness.
It’s as if the further his career slips into speculation, question and benchwarming, the Brand Beckham strategists jack up the sizzle by 25%. That’s a lot of sizzle.
For the sake of our ability to function: stop the global warming. Baby seals, ice caps and Kickette need the hotness to slow down just a tad. We have jobs to go to and such.
Wow, we really lost our minds earlier when we said the shine was coming off of the Golden Balls. David, we will never speak ill of your wondrous shining 24k balls again.
For at least three weeks.
The British football “rich list” is out. And who is at the top of the table? Who is head, shoulders and thighs above the rest?
David is worth
Is it just us, or does it feel like the end of an era?