'Bundesliga' Category

Mats Hummels: Hot In A Hat


Image taken 3.10.2011.

Although it seems Kickette is quickly turning into 1. the haterade water cooler 2. a war zone, it’s just an illusion.

Contrary to conspiracy theorists, we’ve been known to throw a compliment around from time to time. We’ve also been known to wear mismatching bras and panties six days out of seven. Unnerving stuff, we understand.

And even though the majority of what we say about men and style has little validity, the truth is we have a serious soft spot for ‘ballers who rock a head ornament. No, not the Petr Cech preventative type – although he does wear that helmet well. For us, our inner and outer cores melt like under-refridgerated JELL-O shots when confronted by a guy in a fitted hat. And the flatter the brim, the better.

So go on with your ball cap, Nutella-eating self, Mr Hummels. They both suit you and your mustachio bashio facial hair arrangement.

Weekend Results: Show & Tell


hot footballers Hotspur White Heart Lane

Important events in the EPL #1. Image Credit: Getty Images.

We thought we’d liven up the Weekend Results with a cleverly concealed theme today. Keep your eyes peeled as you browse, Kickettes, and see if anything pops out at you.


Oktoberfest: Grimm Fairytales


Manuel Neuer and Kathrin Gilch prepare to enter the magical world of Grimm’s Fairytales, where scary monsters, large wooden staircases and the paparazzi must all be negotiated before they get to live happily ever after. Image: Alexander Hassenstein/Bongarts/Getty Images.

Having already exploited the comedic value of football players in lederhosen for all it’s worth last week, the timing of the release of these photos of the Bayern Munich boys at Oktoberfest couldn’t have been worse.

Fortunately for you (and our legal team’s billing dept) we boast some of the most imaginative and astute minds in football today, and just fifteen minutes in the Mayhem & Fruit Beverages Suite was all it took for these images to be forcibly attached to one of the famed ‘Grimm’s Fairytales’.

Whether it really worked or not is a different story.


Weekend Results: Traumatised Torsos


Image: AP Photo/Daniele Badolato; Dan Istitene/Getty Images Europe.

Early in the season it’s difficult for players to work themselves into sufficient frenzy to rip their shirts off and run around the pitch in merriment. Not so much at stake, y’see.

But fortunately for ab connossieurs like our good selves, trauma and disappointment also evoke a need to bury noses in polyester. So if you’re commiserating your team’s loss this weekend, just remember: every shirt has a silver (ish) lining.

Happy grazing.


Good Week/Bad Week: Lies, Allies & Neuer’s Statistics


Well, this is awkward. Image: REUTERS/Ina Fassbender.


Doin’ It Like A Dude: We’ve enjoyed watching Manuel Neuer respond with quiet dignity to his status as public enemy number one in Germany. You know, all the hating at Schalke because he left them followed up by the hating at Bayern Munich because he signed for them. So it gives us even more pleasure to tell you the cute ass keeper will rack up 1000 minutes of clean sheet-ery if Bayern don’t concede against Hoffenheim on Saturday. Mama was right, Kickettes. Revenge IS a dish best served cold. You know, like borscht.