Michael Ballack Bayer Leverkusen) threw on a suit and did his best to inspire his adoring, fawning (and possibly mental fans) with his dapperness (see left) at the Sportpresseball this weekend in Germany.
And… stretch those muscles. Bastian warms up for the game. (Getty Images/Daylife)
Things have been pretty tough at Bayern Munich this season. Four wins from eleven games sees the champions in a lowly ninth position in the Bundesliga and with injuries to key players, they don’t look to be turning their poor start around any time soon.
For the benefit of the club though, manager Louis Van Gaal has insisted that good morale is vital if the club is going to mount a realistic challenge for the title. Some players have embraced this notion with more enthusiasm (and success) than others. Bastian? Please approach the bench for your Fail File hearing.
Serie A, Ladies & Gents. Where manlove was born. (Reuters/Daylife)
Soooo, we have a small confession-ette to make. The EPL followers among you may have noticed that during Birmingham City’s 2-2 draw with West Ham on Saturday, the sprinkler system inexplicably ‘switched itself on’ (left). This resulted in some players and the referee getting wet. We would like to state that it was indeed, as some of you may have suspected, a Kickette soldier girl who twiddled with the necessary plumbing. (Getty/Daylife)
It’s true.** And we would like to reassure you that while it appeared to be a bit of a let down (limited shirt clinging), this was merely a dress rehearsal in our eternal quest for damp footballers. All we’ll say for now is that it’s El Classico in a few weeks and we’ve got our wrench.
As you were.
David Villa: Goal celebration or sex face? We’re going with the latter, natch. Getty Images/Daylife
Apologies for our absence on Friday, activities were suspended due to the Kickette staff’s attendance of a team building exercise. The weekend, undertaken with the idea of maximising our ability to provide you with exciting, informative posts, involved hiking, building shelters, crossing rivers and lots of mud, all things we were totally prepared to do in the name of our art.
Unfortunately one of our number refused to get off the bus as she found out there were no shops within a 50 mile radius. We were forced to de-camp to the local five star hotel for manicures and meditation.
Still. We tried. Allow us to make it up to you with the Weekend Results.