Okay, so Nike may have decided that none of the 300-odd persons invited to their big Innovation event in London should be female bloggers, but that’s fine.

Because, as our readers know first hand, there are no women anywhere in the world remotely interested in football product launches or getting our behind the scenes news on the Nike players. Cough.

The reason why it’s all good in the hood, though, is down to the fantabulous Chris Toy of Studs Up . He has come to our emotional rescue, Kickettes.

Late last night, Chris took the time to send us an email with Cristiano Ronaldo’s bottom. Just for you, dear readers. He cares. Unfortunately, he seemed to think we wanted a photo of C-Ron’s behind when it’s wearing clothes. But baby steps. Baby steps.

Cris is in London to launch some sort of new whooseywotsits that none of our audience could possibly be interested in, so we’ll skip that part, yeah?

Image via Reuters

Cristiano celebrated his birthday (last Friday) in two parts, beginning by attending an event at the Santiago Bernabeu to help promote sports among the Madrid immigrant and elder populations. He also reportedly held a private dinner at his new Madrid digs and shared the bromantic guest of honor spotlight with Kaka.

Now that we made reference of some news let’s get to the nitty gritty: his approach to smooching. The woman/cougar in question? Someone we can’t be bothered to google. (It is Monday, after all). But we’re still going to judge him for his lean-in. We think it needs work.

Specifically, we’re not impressed with the “lean in for the kill”, closed-eye pucker up. Surely he should be eyes open, cheek forward?

Of course, our first kiss fantasies with Cris always involve him shirtless, so perhaps that’s half the problem right there. Or maybe it’s just good old fashioned jealousy.

Happy belated, Cristiano! Hope you had a wonderful weekend filled with cougars, manbags and Gucci gift cards!

Random: C-Ron was voted second sexiest sportsman in Portgual. What the?