'Cristiano' Category

Sara Carbonero: Forbidden From Talking About Cristiano Ronaldo


This story gets two enthusiastic thumbs up and one not-so-pleasant middle finger. Images: Google.

Hear ye, hear ye! The Kickette Court of Common Law is now in session.

On today’s docket we have a Pasta-producing, Iker Casillas-loving journalist in the line of fire as she fends off Real Madrid and one heavily bruised, star striker’s ego.

Ladies and gentleman of the jury, throw on your best court shoes and come on in.


Kickette Catch Up: Christmas Weekend Gossip Cheat Sheet


Atletico Madrid Liverpool

Care to comment on this habberdashery of colour that exploded at Maxi Rodriguez’s house on Christmas Day? Image: Sergio Aguero’s Twitter.

How was the start to your holidays, Kickettes? Ours were gluttonous, to say the least, but how did other footy stars spend their holidays? Hope you enjoy catching up with our short list of gift-giving guys and gals during our momentary jolt of motivation. We’re going back to beddies now.


- Atletico Madrid man, Sergio ‘Kun’ Aguero, wished Maxi Rodriguez a Merry Christmas in person because the entire Aguero clan spent the holidays in Liverpool.

- We’re not sure, but Italian media speculated on the prospects of Mario Balotelli walk of shaming it back to Manchester from his supposed new WAGabee‘s pad.

- Two from Real Madrid spent their few festive days off elsewhere: Jose Mourinho, and his family jetted off to New York City while Cristiano Ronaldo and his girlfriend Irina Shayk shacked up in the Maldives.


Weekend Results: Tight(s) At The Top


To close for comfort? Maybe for some… (Reuters/Getty)

There’s something for everyone in the Weekend Results as we move inexorably towards the carnage that is the festive break. The EPL, La Ligue and Ligue 1 are all tight as an unwanted base layer, while the Bundesliga and Serie A look to be over before you can say ‘We’ll take a bottle of Cristal and five straws, please’.

That statement just about covers our thoughts this Monday morning. Baller bodies and booze. That’s where we’re at, team! Let’s try and justify our existence to the wider world with actual football news, shall we?


Step & Don’t Repeat: Irina Shayk


Cristiano Ronaldo WAG girlfriend

Cristiano Ronaldo’s WAG, Irina Shayk, matched her nails and lips to the scarlet-hued press line carpet as she put the paps in their place during her walk along the Charlize Theron African Outreach Project’s press line. Security was probably on a smoke break as she (and camera-starved friend/fellow model Jessica White) slipped inside The Darby in New York City to rub elbows with the likes of Liv Tyler, John Hamm and Charlize herself. Images: Getty Images via Daylife.

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El Clasico: Ignoring The Obvious (Sort Of)


Images: Google, Daylife.

Aah, Tuesday. The sun is not shining, the birds that haven’t migrated for the winter are barely chirping, and we’re thankful to have survived another El Clasico. More importantly, we were fortunate (or unfortunate, depending on how you look at it) to be out of Sergio’s harmful/less way.

Here’s us stating the obvious: there was not enough nekkidness.

Here’s us ignoring the obvious: watching the Spanish slapiesta that ensued was like reading Kanye West’s tweets.

It’s moments like these that make us crave melodious harmonies and jazzercise ballads from the 80′s. So, without further ado, here’s what was on our iHome replay following El Clasico, Part I.

We know this makes less sense than Guti’s collection of vests, but when we get that feeling, we want sexual healing. And this game offered none of that. Did we say that already? Yea, we’re bitter.