'Cristiano' Category

Barcelona Win the Champions League

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imageAs we all know, Barcelona won the Champions League in fine style last night.

And, as we also all know, there was a shocking disregard for the historic tradition of post-game chest festivities. Nary a bare torso could be seen on the pitch.

Even Cristiano. Et tu, Brute?

We were shocked. Shocked and stunned, we were.  Needless to say, a formal complaint will be filed with UEFA.

Full props to Barca for two cracking goals and an impressive show out there.  Manchester United were gracious in defeat, admitting that they just didn’t play as well as they should have.

Thierry Henry had this to say about the game:

“I’ve been waiting so long to get this title,“ the French star told ITV. “The last five minutes were the longest of my life. You never know what can happen. We were playing against the best team in the world.“

In random interesting news, Pep Guardiola dedicated Barca’s win to Paolo Maldini.

How is everybody feeling the morning after the night before?

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We have a Baller Bingo winner: Baby Freya scored big with card number 4. Her prize? She gets to pick teams for the next two Thursday Thigh Offs, starting in mid-June. Congrats!

Lazy Links & Randoms

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We find it hard to concentrate on Cristiano Ronaldo’s love life when he shows us thighs like this. But for those who can focus, he’s now dating Luana Belletti, sister to Chelsea’s Juliano Belletti.

Burnley’s going to the Premier League. Certainly this is an occasion for novelty pants and short tents?

There comes a point when you have to take off your stilettos, find a pair of fluffy slippers and call retirement on the club scene for a while. Danielle Lloyd has reached that point. Crikey. Wonder what really happened?

A lovely looking Coleen Rooney heads off to Rome to support her man in the Champions League final tomorrow.  Have you made your prediction on when baby Roo will arrive?

Speaking of Wayne, Lionel Messi opens up in this exclusive interview about tomorrow’s big game and why he rates Mr R. as one of the best out there.

Freaking out about the CL final tomorrow? This cute ad with Giggsy and Thierry will help ease the freak. Or, make it exponentially worse.

imageWell done to Wolfsburg, who have taken the title in the Bundesliga. As is per usual, all the boys got to pose with the big trophy/plate thing. We thought Marcel Schaefer did it best. Congrats!

And of course, another big congratulations to Rangers who have arrived at the top of the Scottish League after their win over Dundee United 3-0 on Sunday. It’s because they have the delish Maurice Edu. He’s too lush to lose anything.

Cristiano Ronaldo: My Eyes!

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If you have anything planned for the rest of the day, cancel it. You’ll need to be doing every manner of CSI-level scanning and analyzing to determine the owner of the package in question.

Btw, we feel this video is completely mistitled – Cristiano looks hella uncomfortable to us, not “intrigued”. More of a “didn’t see a thing there, mate. But I am going to move over just a little bit and try to spell my name backwards to clear my mind of this vision” type of vibe.

That’s our take after watching this six dozen times, anyway.

UPDATE: Apparently, it’s Park Ji-Sung who’s so… happy.  Who knew?  See here, and here. Since he’s next to Evra, you can hardly blame him. Thanks Amber!

Via ONTD Football

Lazy Links & Randoms

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Luca Toni on a scooter.  Stranger things have happened.


Bobo Vieri has his own line of condoms. No football club to speak of, but at least he’s protected.

Victoria Beckham decides it’s time to shut down David’s penis. As if that’s possible.

Ledley King was arrested for assault this weekend.  From one drama to another. Yikes.

Oh, for the love of… Another skanktastic skeevie heads to the tabloids for tales of Cristiano Ronaldo’s bedroom antics. Someone get this lady some undies that fit and then perhaps we’ll listen.

Tottenham’s Wilson Palacios has been informed that his little brother Edwin, who was kidnapped two years ago, has died.  Tragic news.

1. This video of the Barca boys on an airplane confirms any suspicions you might have about football player maturity levels. 2. Victor Valdes is supremely delish. 3. Pique as DJ = win.

Champions League Semis: Observations

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Ana Vidic arrives at Old Trafford to watch Manchester United v Arsenal in the Champions League semi-finals first leg.

First leg down, one more to go.  Here’s a few random observations on last night’s game:

-As was expected, Nemanja Vidic continued his reign of being the sexiest robot on UK shores.

-Not so sexy, Theo Walcott’s pirate/pornstache.  Is it responsible for his muted performance? Well, obviously.

-We need to seek professional counseling over our Cesc Fabregas intense love. We may have squealed like candy-high fan girls when we saw him line up.

-Cristiano Ronaldo’s on-pitch spasm/tantrum/hissy fit was one of the most entertaining and magical things we’ve seen. We eagerly await video. Please, someone, send us the damn video.

-Arsenal keeper Manuel Almunia did a fantastic job last night, no? Wonder if the John O’Shea goal is messing with him.

-Yes, it most definitely is messing with him. “If O’Shea comes near my goal in the next leg I’m gonna beat the apostrophe out of his last name…“ Best fake quote ever.

-Speaking of John O’Shea, he turns 28 today. Happy birthday!

-Still waiting for that C-Ron video. If you love him, you’ll love it. If you hate him, you’ll love it too. It’s a win-win situation.

-Rio Ferdinand injured a rib, was subbed, didn’t realise it and tried to run back on the pitch to play. He was pissed when he discovered he was out of the game.

-He expressed his emotions by yelling, “F*ck!“ in plain view of Fergie and the cameras.

-We now have a crush on Rio”Shake it off” Ferdinand as a result.

Missed the game? Catch the highlights here.

Update: Well, that was fast. Here’s the Cristiano vid! [via Offthepost]