Something big happened last night, Kickettes. Something that could give reason for little piggies to take flight. Seen out at the Marie Claire Prix de la Moda Awards at the French Embassy Thursday evening, Cristiano Ronaldo did the unfathomable: he wore Hermès.
We know it’s a mind-numbing notion to take in, dear readers. After all, this is the walking God of Gucci we’re talking about here.
We, ourselves, were shaken to the core so deeply at such a sight that we couldn’t find the strength to continue writing. We did, however, have enough energy to compile more pics of these two lovebirds.
Where there is a will, we find a shortcut.
Irina Shayk, Dolores Aveiro and Katia Dos Santos (not pictured) at the Intercontinental hotel in Madrid, Spain.
Irina Shayk’s made-for-our-left-hands golf ball-sized ring is playing tricks on us. We first laid eyes on it last week during Cristiano’s Golden Boot presentation, but by Sunday evening, it was noticeably absent during Irina’s walk down the European Music Awards red carpet.
The wooly mammoth of bling deserves a name. We think.
Sleek, glossy, edgy where necessary but with the kind of subtle, smooth finish that betrays serious, unbridled wealth. The boot isn’t bad, either. Image: REUTERS/Sergio Perez.
Nope, he’s not shilling another pair of retina bothering football boots. In this photograph, the goofy grin, perma-tan and gel-tastic hairdo have gathered to collect the European Golden Shoe Award; a boot shaped lump of metal handed to the player who scored the most goals in the European Leagues during the previous season.
Ronaldo or Leo Messi, in other words.
We bet you didn’t think it was one of his new cleat designs anyway. This is a significantly more sober colourway than the ones Crispy tends to choose for himself.
Congratulations anyway, lovely. All you need to do now is make room for it in your manbag.
Here’s a guy who is single-handedly keeping the textiles industry afloat. In case you couldn’t tell, it’s corduroy. And thanks to our Twitter followers for cluing us in on the Emporio Armani basketball team situ! Image Credit: JAVIER SORIANO/AFP/Getty Images.
Personally, we find Cristiano Ronaldo’s reckless abuse of Gucci to be obnoxiously OTT, but we’re big enough to put our differences aside when it comes to identifying hotness.
Well done us.
Image Credit: Getty Images Europe.
Guys on the ground – as well as those who are going to the ground, whether it be purposely or accidentally – are generally more fun to gawk at. This isn’t a question or one of our curazy theories, Kickettes. It’s just how the world works.
Since there’s been an explosion of unhinged football flesh in various states of public showcase lately, we’re elated to photo spam your places of employment while we scour the internet for ‘real news’.