'English Premier League' Category

Lazy Links & Randoms


With everyone dressed in their Monday afternoon best, The Rooney family enjoyed one last meal together in centre-city Liverpool before Wayne departed for South Africa with his national teammates.  How many designer labels can you properly ID on Coleen? We counted four: Birkin, Christian Louboutin, J Brand and Louis Vuitton.

Star Wars geeks, try not to lose your mind over this mix of footy, Snoop Dogg and “The Force”. For shizzle!

Everton’s Jack Rodwell launches their new away kit with a striptease that could have used some Kickette consulting for better gyration.

Steven Gerrard likes Lucozade.

Hot men with earrings. It can happen.

Kickette gives Dirty Tackle readers a basic insight into footy hotness.

Hapy b-day to Germany’s Lukas Podolski!

Drama over the Dutchy Dress.

James Corden + Wayne Rooney = LOL

Bordeaux deny that the Premier League could be getting 75% better looking.

Product Shill: English Boys “No More Talk” For Nike


Original image via Christopher Lee/Getty Images

Just in case you forget, Ash.*

*Oh, fine. Nike didn’t actually make Ashley Cole wear that exact shirt, the Kickette photoshop monkeys did.

FYI, Wayne Rooney, Rio Ferdinand and Ash were at Niketown’s “No More Talk” event on June 2nd, prior to heading to South Africa.

After the sadface news today, we’re going to go with a “No More Injuries” branded tee, though, cheers.

Belated B-Day Wishes: Andrey Arshavin, Steven Gerrard


Belated birthday bumps are in store for Andrey Arshavin (29) Steven Gerrard (30!) this week. So let us raise a glass (or six) of celebratory champers and wish these two a fabulous birthday.

Although Andrey (May 29th) looks like a baby-faced boy scout, our fave Russian hobbit is 29 years of age with an adorable family to boot. May the next year bring him lots more lols, more random quotage, and the answer to what keeps him and his wife Yulia looking like they sip from the fountain of youth, so we can place our bulk order, natch.

While Stevie G. (May 30th) looks more his age, we can’t help but wonder what the “dirty thirties” will bring him. Another forehead wrinkle? Another nifty leather jacket or more cutesy photo ops with his adorable fam? Perhaps a new Liverpool BFF to replace the luscious Xabi Alonso? Whatever it brings, we hope he has a fabu time, and a better footy season than this year.

So Kickettes, raise your glasses, and if you spot these two EPL birthday boys out and about, drinks are on them!

EPL Newbies: A Stalking Summary


Somewhat lost amid the hysteria of the CL final, the Championship Play Off Final to decide the last EPL promotion spot took place at Wembley Stadium on Saturday afternoon. Cardiff City and Blackpool fought an epic battle, with Cardiff taking the lead twice, but it was Blackpool who will be entertaining the likes of Manchester United, Chelsea et al at Bloomfield Road next season, winning 3-2 on the day.

Enough “proper” footy talk; let’s get to the real news at hand, shall we? Three clubs have now been promoted to the English Premier League.

In other words, we need to alert you to the box-fresh man-flesh that will be parading up and down your screens next season. Here’s a handy run-down to the newly promoted teams.


Lazy Links & Randoms


This is why the off-season is dangerous to one’s mental health: the brilliant Studs-Up “The Wizard of Coz” comic series based on fancy pink football boots and the havoc they wreak.  Warning: contains Nicklas Bendtner as the Wicked Witch of the East, Fernando Torres as Glinda complete with pink… cotton candy(??) as shoulder pads.

- Chezza got paid a quarter of a mill for 30 minutes work. Don’t hate, appreciate.

- From the “which rep planted this story?” files: The Beckhams make-out in the cinema.

- Alex Gerrard isn’t hitting the gym while she’s on vacation with the family.

- Samuel Eto’o has diagonal abs. Impressive.

- Why Guti rules: he gets a yellow card when he’s not even on the pitch. Bad bout of PMT, maybe?

- Cesc, please don’t leave the PL! England need LOLs like this to survive. (But if you do go, would you mind sending over Gourcuff to help ease the loss?)

- John Terry’s ability to catch a beer can with one hand is kind of a turn on.

- Hot Germans in suits, in B&W. It’s all good.

- Can you ID this footballer’s house? It’s a stalker’s time to shine, so don’t be shy.

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