
Somewhat lost amid the hysteria of the CL final, the Championship Play Off Final to decide the last EPL promotion spot took place at Wembley Stadium on Saturday afternoon. Cardiff City and Blackpool fought an epic battle, with Cardiff taking the lead twice, but it was Blackpool who will be entertaining the likes of Manchester United, Chelsea et al at Bloomfield Road next season, winning 3-2 on the day.
Enough “proper” footy talk; let’s get to the real news at hand, shall we? Three clubs have now been promoted to the English Premier League.
In other words, we need to alert you to the box-fresh man-flesh that will be parading up and down your screens next season. Here’s a handy run-down to the newly promoted teams.
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This is why the off-season is dangerous to one’s mental health: the brilliant Studs-Up “The Wizard of Coz” comic series based on fancy pink football boots and the havoc they wreak.Ā Warning: contains Nicklas Bendtner as the Wicked Witch of the East, Fernando Torres as Glinda complete with pink… cotton candy(??) as shoulder pads.
- Chezza got paid a quarter of a mill for 30 minutes work. Don’t hate, appreciate.
- From the “which rep planted this story?” files: The Beckhams make-out in the cinema.
- Alex Gerrard isn’t hitting the gym while she’s on vacation with the family.
- Samuel Eto’o has diagonal abs. Impressive.
- Why Guti rules: he gets a yellow card when he’s not even on the pitch. Bad bout of PMT, maybe?
- Cesc, please don’t leave the PL! England need LOLs like this to survive. (But if you do go, would you mind sending over Gourcuff to help ease the loss?)
- John Terry’s ability to catch a beer can with one hand is kind of a turn on.
- Hot Germans in suits, in B&W. It’s all good.
- Can you ID this footballer’s house? It’s a stalker’s time to shine, so don’t be shy.
Follow us on Twitter if you want the breaking news first or to see photos we can’t afford to buy, fan us on Facebook if you want to discuss Sergio’s pleather jackets, and subscribe to our RSS feed in your reader if you know what the hell that is. Cheers!

Images via Hola! magazine, AS.com, Getty Images Europe
Saturday
- The Beckhams treated their trio of boys to the Jonas Brothers’ summer tour kick-off concert in Los Angeles. Romeo Beckham (above) demonstrated how to properly wear one summer staple: white sunglasses. Chic in his own right, Cruz Beckham chose eccentric red shades to go with his uniquely suave hairstyle.
- We launched our Facebook page! No, we don’t know how to use it. But a little thing like that shouldn’t stop you from adding us…
- Weekend Gossip regular Cheryl Cole took to the Berlin stage Saturday evening in her visually displeasing costumes. She also treated some lucky fans to autographs while passing through Zurich airport. Has news of Ashley’s toilet cubicle mate caught up with her yet?
- An enraged Malaga fan tossed a water bottle at Cristiano Ronaldo’s head as he exited Real Madrid’s away game travel bus. Some Kickette staffers found his method of duckery humorous.
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Images via Hola! magazine, Getty Images Europe, GQ Sport magazine
Some sloppy WAGabee soiled our red velvet ropes over the weekend, allowing two ladies we’re not-so-thrilled about to bypass the “WAG Club” bouncers.
First, Iker Casillas and Sara “Pastasauce⢔ Carbonero played tonsil hockey in plain sight of the public, much to the disdain of our telly screens. Then, they were spotted hand.in.hand at the Alejandro Sanz concert.
While carbs are banned in our South Beach Diet-loving flats, and even though we formerly refused to accept her as one of our own, Pastasauce’s ability to withstand Iker’s dating ADD enabled her to swindle our clipboard gal into WAG Club main bar entrance.
Don’t worry, we’ve fired our internal failure. In the meantime, this no cover charge/no queues access bears no resemblance to an unrestricted Kickette WAG Club membership. Rather, Sara is on a probationary, VIP-exclusions basis, of course.
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