'English Premier League' Category

Bubbas & ‘Ballers: Pepe and Alma ‘Pebbles’ Reina


Coming around for their victory lap, our fallopian tubes got choked up this morning at the sight of this adorable daddy-and-me-and-my-ponytail pipc of the Liverpool goalkeeper. Everything obvious aside, we’re enamored with the fact that Pepe’s bald, shiny noggin’ is being used as a source of shoulder-riding stability.

Nicklas Bendtner: Pretty ‘Fly’ For a White Guy


Images via MSN Starlounge

While Nicklas Bendtner and his baroness/WAG, Caroline Fleming, have been making more of a public showing lately, what’s most compelling about this loved-up pair is Bendtner’s complete lack of zipper awareness.

Looking quite glam at the Danish Fashion Awards last night, Nicky B. walked the entire dark carpet with his fly down.  Forgetting to zip your trousers brings up 2.5 interesting questions:

- If you spotted someone of Nicky’s ilk, would you politely tell them to keep their goods securely fastened?

- Or what if your privates were the centre of the public transport’s attention? Would you re-adjust in plain sight or sweat out your nerves on the inside?

While our perverse minds would like to envision the intricate type of sexy times these two were managing in the back seat of their hired car, we don’t think Caroline’s fluffy swan tail would be very conducive to that mischievous behaviour. Do you?

Lazy Links & Randoms


So the midweek slump is a day late, but has now arrived and is currently residing in the Kickette stationary drawer. We’re tired and emotional, people. So sit back, relax and navigate these fun stories by people who aren’t lazy asses. Today, they do the work. So we don’t have to.

- First up, since we’ve not yet hit our limit on cute footballer kids, here’s Blackburn’s Paul Robinson with Lucy and Jack, and team-mate Christopher Samba with his wee son. Extra points to baby for not being scared of the mascot. Those things freak us out more than clowns. *shudder*

- Now onto a message to the England NT. Pay attention, please. There’s a major tourney coming up and your record isn’t great in this area. But at least you won’t go hungry.

- Okay, enough with the sarcasm. We are SOOOO excited.

- Not enough pretty for you yet? Agreed. Check out the German NT team. Nummy!

- Tottenham Hotspur’s Luka Modric got married. Our in house translator has advised us that the couple arrived dressed down and changed at the registry office and had chocolate cake for dessert. More piccies here although sadly, none of the cake. But  what better start could a couple hope for? Congrats, kids!

- We don’t even care if this story from the Sun isn’t true. It’s bloomin EPIC. If you’re considering not bothering to click, it involves Cristiano Ronaldo’s baby makin parts. M’kay?

- Our fave fashion females, The Fug Girls, have assessed the tragic breakdown of Cheryl Cole’s concert costumes.

- In case you’ve forgotten, maybe due to burnout or excessive inhalation of nail varnish, Dimi Berbatov IS The Continental.

- In what we imagine to be totally pointless attempt to escape speculation re: their relationship and get their tanning in early this year (due to the World Cup), Steven and Alex Gerrard have gone on holiday.

- Our second favourite pretty poppet Carlos Tevez (second only to Jimmy Bullard in the hawt stakes) picked up two honours at the Manchester City Awards. Congrats, CT!

- Need a reminder why you love the EPL? Look no further.

- Or Bojan? Mmmmm, puppy.

Dreams Do Come True: Fernando Torres Gets A Haircut


Image via Marca.com

Those who have been reading this site for some time will be aware how big the news of Fernando Torres getting a haircut truly is. Election results? England squad selects and injuries? It’s all Eyjafjallajökull in comparison.

Yes, we’re serious. Please leave now if you don’t understand the seriousness. But do take and enjoy a free Jaffa cake on the way out.

We’ve often waxed lyrical about our desire to see Fern go back to his youthful days at Atletico, when being friends with a shaver set to level 3 was just fine. And oh, how we’ve craved the knowledge of what Nando’s natural hair colour would be: the colour of freshly minted gold? A bountiful harvest of shimmering wheat? The rich tones of a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios?

You guessed right, dear readers: it’s all of those things.

See more photos at ONTD Football. Thanks Jasmine for the tip! And don’t forget to follow us on twitter and join our Facebook page! We can’t stop exclaiming things! We’re just so excited about Nando’s hair!

Federico Macheda: Man-Child Or Man And Child?


Kiko Macheda and baby

You read it here first, Kickettes.

Federico Macheda, he of 18 years of earth-walking experience, is a father. Although no details are available to confirm the 4 W’s and 1 H of this story, we do know the fresh-out-of-the-oven baby girl is named Natalya Stefani.

No, former fiancee Martina Minafra is not 50% responsible for this wee little tadpole’s creation. Her blissful period sadly ended almost as dramatically as it began. Recall: that this young couple’s run at glory began while canoodling in public. Around the same time that Macheda was rumoured to be dating Sophie Houghton.