Can anyone believe it’s April, already? Clearly, Cesc can’t.
Although yesterday we were recommending Abbey Clancy’s curry diet to drop a few extra kilos before the summer, we’ve since changed our minds. We are now fully on board with the Champions League weight loss method through extreme stress, adrenaline and nervous twitches. Hello, skinny jeans!
While you plan your bikini weeklies, feel free to have a look at our CL observations from the past two days. Meanwhile, we’re going to seek a live-in nurse to administer an IV of alcohol for the remaining portion of the tournament. Hey, we’re just following Lisandro’s orders to put our thinking caps on.
Images: AP Photo, Getty Images
It works like this: until we’ve figured out why the image of two grown heterosexual men fondling one another has quite the effect on our loins that it does, we’re duty bound to continue to supply these images to you. And don’t be mistaken, Kickettes, today’s manlove is double their fun, triple our pleasure.We’re gluttons for ravenous brotherly love.
On the left, we see the ever lovely Yoann Gourcuff (Bordeaux), who is so proud of his nipples he wants to show them to Lyon’s Jeremy Toulalan. Jeremy demonstrates his happiness at this by stroking them. A few days ago we might have said a tad over-friendly. Then this happened. Welcome to the new nipple-norm.
On the right, Bojan Krkic (Barcelona) plays an emotionally lovelorn senorita reduced to vertical tears when faced with teammate Andres Iniesta’s tantalizing touch. Bless.
Finally, did you guys always have a nagging feeling that the whole Frank Lampard/John Terry relationship was secretly one-sided? We did. That’s why it’s so good to see the two of them at-it-like-old-non-cheating-times. It’s just unadulterated manlove. And leave it to Frankie & JT to get. it. done.
So, whatddya say, ‘baller boys? Is it the ho-tel, mo-tel or Holiday Inn?
Photo via StephenIreland.com
Last month, we caught wind of a Manchester City charity function that was supposedly a sight for sore eyes. We heard that Stephen Ireland and girlfriend, Jessica Lawler, raised an impressive £110,000 for the Francis House Children’s Hospice at their Valentine’s Day benefit party. There was talk of bubbly and bad fashion aplenty but no photos.
Then, just like Dorothy when she landed in far-away Oz, we got the photo collection. Unlike Dorothy, however, we couldn’t click our red Manolos to make it all go away. *Velvet and Lace and Bows, OH MY!*
In summary, fashion offenders included:
- Shay Given wearing crushed velvet; Jane Given as Claudine Keane
- Shawn Wright-Philips with an un-tied bow tie
- Winona De Jong in a Stella McCartney lace onesie. A high street designer does not make a lace jumpsuit posh, Mrs. D.
If the attire wasn’t enough, there was some weirdly awkward WAG touching, too. Just as we thought we could bring closure to the helter-skelter fashion failure that was, we stumbled upon a Nigel De Jong boogeying down video that helps us all relive this rather fantabulous festivity in all its’ glory.
Editor Note: Visit the Manchester City Official Club page to donate to the cause.
- Chelsea’s Michael Ballack headed to Zuma and Frank Lampard hit up ChinaWhite to celebrate their win this weekend. Yes. ChinaWhite. It still exists, Kickettes.
- As the good fellas at World of MUFC alerted us, Emma Neville gave birth to her second daughter, Sophie, last week. Congrats to Gary Neville and family.
- Seems as though Vanessa Perroncel has successfully built herself a (Wayne-funded?) bridge and gotten over it. She was spotted Saturday evening on a night out after her reported £1 mill in support claim was granted. She was also spotted by some Chelsea boys on a night out. How fun.
Spring has sprung ladies, and as we all know, in Springtime a young footballer’s thoughts turn to love. Or, in the case of Celtic’s Josh Thompson, something else entirely. We are not the only ones to think this goal celebration looks a bit, well, thorough, are we?
Anyway, Robbie seems pleased. The matter has been referred to the Kickette Short Tent Institute and we will revert in due course.