'English Premier League' Category

Hat Trick Heroes: Nicklas Bendtner and Darren Bent

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‘Ballers need breaks too, ya know. In fact, taking a mid-game breather on the pitch seems to be the preferred chillax method of treatment as of late.

Last night, in the midst of completing a Champions League hat trick against FC Porto, Nicklas Bendtner rested his head, shoulders, knees and toes. And although watching him trot around in those base layers leaves us feeling weak as well, the clear “money shot” provided Wednesday with the juice needed. Rando fact: last night’s three-goal effort was the first of Bendtner’s career. Are we the only ones demanding a repeat no pants dance party to celebrate?

In league news, Darren Bent helped Sunderland in the EPL table by scoring a trio of his own against Bolton. Just to reiterate, lying down after kicking pitch-arse is a very good look. So much so that we think both Bendtner and Bent are two fine recommendations for Dirty Tackle’s next installment of sleeping and/or napping ‘ballers; don’t you agree?

Through The Years: David Beckham Bromances

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Some say David + Iker - Victoria = True Love. We say his return to Milan has reignited his interest in Marco Borriello much to the delight of our fangirl impulses.  Watching David and Marco flirt shamelessly through all of their matches gets our pulses racing the same way he and original love, Gary Neville, did in the late ’90s.

In honor of his return to Old Trafford tonight for the second leg of  the Milan v. Manchester United Champions League tie, we’re taking a trip down manlove memory lane. With each of his European teams, David’s had a hard time keeping his hands and heart to himself. Why don’t you join us in thinking fondly back to Beckham’s best bromantic moves?

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The Tuesday Torso: Micah Richards, Manchester City

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Just don’t look at his belly button and you’ll be all good.

Product Shill: Frank Lampard for Walkers

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Sure, it’s a tad random to see Frank Lampard in a red kit, but once you find out it’s a promo for Walkers it all makes sense. Lampsy and cheese & onion crisps? Is there anything better? Top nums.

Here’s another clip of Gary Lineker and Frank Lampard in the town of Sandwich.

Mini-Break: Wayne Bridge and Shaun Wright-Phillips in Miami

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Considering the reputations Manchester City’s Wayne Bridge and Shaun Wright-Phillips have, we’re quite sure simply they’re checking the weather report for Miami Beach and not planning a hardcore night of fun, frolicks and skankaliciousness.

Here’s a tip, lads: Denim has no place in the heat. Get to strippin’. (See the dudes behind you for inspiration.)