Coleen McLoughlin got her hair groove on at the Barbara Daley salon in preparation for John Terry and Toni Poole’s wedding today. Who gets married on a Friday? Smart people who want their friends to be able to show up, that’s who.
Coleen and her man Wayne Rooney have a very busy weekend – rumour has it that they’ll be attending all three of the big bashes this summer of love weekend.
Cristiano Ronaldo returned to Portugal to show off his favourite accessory, (no, not Gemma Atkinson), his Louis Vuitton man bag.
Cristiano was in Madiera for the CR7 fashion show. The stern looking gal is his sister, Elma, who heads up the label/shop in Funchal whilst Cristiano hits the pitch and/or polishes his yellow leather blazer.
Out of the infinite number of cute outfits that exist in this world, this ensemble of loveliness came out on top when Victoria Beckham collected her Glamour magazine Woman of The Year Award.
Our thoughts? Put on a bloody pair of trousers you ninny. Or at least something that resembles the lower half of an outfit. Surely this is a combination of random fashion trends that have come together to die a slow, painful and public death in an excruciating 80s meets biker non-chic half Madonna half pantsless cabaret singer way? Fingerless leather driving gloves? Really?
Victoria can’t be entirely held to blame for this fiasco, she was under the guise and stylings of Karl Lagerfeld, who hasn’t eaten anything since 1986 and obviously can’t be trusted.
Or, perhaps Victoria is still recovering after showing up at the MTV Awards on the weekend in a pleather/leather zebra print concoction wearing the same Christian Louboutin shoes as Cameron Diaz. You know that had to hurt, right?
Note Victoria’s particularly vice-like grip on Cameron’s pity fingers in the photos below.
Victoria, we love the ostentatiousness of rocking a Tiffany blue Chanel jacket over a spandex ensemble of bone hugging leggings and PVC corset belt. We do.
We love that you are actually wearing spandex in public, without a sweatshirt tied around your waist to hide your ass from the general pubic. Very admirable.
The shoes are the hotness. As is the lemon-sized rock on the finger.
But here’s the thing – if your non-hidden ass is so bony you could cut glass with it, the time may have come to eat a carb or two.
We recommend a big bacon butty and some chips. With lots of mayo. And a side of more bacon. And some eggs benedict. A hot chocolate with marshmallows. Etc.
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