Having recently noted that football players are currently undertaking a ‘cool’ by association’ program through basketball, we feel it is our duty to bring you the latest examples of this sporting symbiosis.
Things had got so bad in the French NT dressing room, Florent Malouda was prepared to sacrifice almost anything for the all important win. Image: Getty Images, Reuters via Daylife
All this international friendly/European qualifier shenanigans is playing merry hell with our sanity, Kickettes. To be quite honest we haven’t got a clue who’s playing who, for what reason and when this will all go away and we can return to our happy little world of short tents, toned torsos and the occasional league match, which we can peacefully enjoy with a large margarita and a bucket of nachos.
It’s all a little too much like work, y’know.
Hands up who ordered two sweaty Spanish boys? Images: Reuters, Getty Images via Daylife
It’s Euro 2012 qualifiers, Kickettes! Admittedly we were taken a touch by surprise; the office diary ‘system’ having only just caught up the start of the new domestic season, but we’ve had our morning caffeine hit (or ten) and are feeling just about excitable enough to run through the results before we crash. Gah!
Image: Reuters via Daylife
Mexes: Yes, the sides can be problematic but I find a soupcon of product helps with that. The rest is simply a matter of grab, twist and secure. Hey presto, pretty piggies!
Benzema: You don’t say?!
News breaks of Didier’s punishment. He seems concerned, Kickettes. Images: Getty Images, Reuters via Daylife
Far be it from us to make light of an awful situation, but last week’s news that North Korea’s NT coach and players have been punished for the team’s poor performance at the World Cup got us thinking.
While these part-timers put their hearts and souls into every game, even scoring a cheeky goal against Brazil, we want to address several of the footy world’s greatest, many of which didn’t live up to their expensive reps during this year’s tournament.
Therefore, we have invented a series of cruel and unusual punishments, devilishly designed to hit a randomly selected player exactly where it hurts the most.
Think you can just show up and pass the time lads? We’ll teach you a lesson you’ll never forget…
OK, first up we’ll admit that the Drog’s injury prior to the tournament *may* have impeded his ability to set the WC on fire. But if we were fair and reasonable, this post would not make any sense at all.