After taking his sweetie for a cup of whothehellcares at Starbucks yesterday, Frank Lampard hit his stride on the London streets.
This whole thing just works. And don’t even bother fighting us on this one.
- Robbie Savage, Roque Santa Cruz and their Man City teammates were Twitpic’d at a charity cook-off event on Saturday. Ironically, we and Robbie happen to share the same pet name for Roque: ‘gorgeous’. What are the odds of that?
- Dasha Zhukova looked post-baby beautiful on the red carpet at the Grace Kelly: Style Icon private exhibition viewing. Dasha and boyfriend, Roman Abramovich, had baby Aaron four months ago in the States. It was the Chelsea FC owner’s sixth child.
- We were saddened to learn that Franck Ribery has been questioned as a witness by authorities investigating another French NT player’s involvement related to prostitution involving a minor. Ugh.
- With the abundance of WAG news on Saturday, it’s no wonder High Street stores are hawking kiddies tees with ‘Future WAG’ emblazoned across the front. Double ugh.
- It’s about 10 weeks until summer officially starts and Sporting’s Grimi Damian reminds us that even sunscreen application is essential for protecting skin from harmful rays and avoiding public embarrassment.
- For the record, we have come to terms with the whole Frank Lampard/Christine Bleakley thing. Does this mean we are embracing Bleakers as Frankie’s lady? Mmm… kinda. Ish. Either way, we’re still irritated by the Daily Mail implying that the couple’s meal after Chelsea’s 1-0 EPL win over Bolton Wanderers last night was somehow spoiled by the presence of Christine’s mum. Did mother-in-law gags not phase out at the same time as working men’s clubs and comb-overs? Well, they should’ve.
- Meanwhile, a sneak preview of Chelsea’s new kit has become available. A+for the snug fit, but why have the players been forced to pose as Subbuteo players? Was it the same reason Nando was forced to pose as a lady in Liverpool’s new kit pics? We smell conspiracy theory.
- The Spoiler have moved slightly away from their hairy campaign and reverted to cutie pie pictures of ballers. However. The first thing we thought was how weird it was to see Wayne Rooney. With hair. That he didn’t draw himself.
- Here’s David Beckham in the 1990’s. Sigh. Those WAATP boys always know how to take care of us.
Spring has sprung ladies, and as we all know, in Springtime a young footballer’s thoughts turn to love. Or, in the case of Celtic’s Josh Thompson, something else entirely. We are not the only ones to think this goal celebration looks a bit, well, thorough, are we?
Anyway, Robbie seems pleased. The matter has been referred to the Kickette Short Tent Institute and we will revert in due course.
Last night, Mr. Mourinho’s Inter Milan men showed Chelsea the European tournament door.
The Blues out of the Champions League isn’t the only eye-brow raise of late, though: First victim was Liverpool earlier this year. Real Madrid was next on the chopping block. What this evening holds, we might not be able to manage.
What else do the likes of Frank’s pout, Cristiano’s purple boots and Fernando’s side-eye have to settle for? We dread to think.
Since we’re not content to rest on our laurels here at Kickette Towers, (not unless they’re certified, nailed-on Chanel, anyway), we’ve secured Victoria Beckham’s* humble services to provide essential direction and guidance to some of those embroiled in the hot mess we call this year’s Champions League. Take it away, Lampsy!