'Hook Ups' Category

Lazy Links & Randoms

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Male bonding, Spurs-style: everyone gets inked at the same tattoo parlour.  Vedran, once the ink has started, it’s too late to make an escape, love.

Another WAGabee/skeeve joins the “I’m with Cristiano now” pile of tabloid muck. Zzzz. And, whatevs.

34% of British men said they would rather see their sexual partner wearing their team’s jersey than in lingerie.  No statistic provided on how many of those polled have ever been in a relationship.

Shaquille O’Neill: he twitters, he eats a lot of food, he saves goals.

The inside scoop on how Man Utd’s Ben Foster prepared for those Carling Cup penalty kicks: Sussudio.  Or, perhaps it was an even more basic method for success.

Step aside one-time baller daters. Let Danielle “I’m on my sixth(?) footballer” Lloyd show you how it’s done. 

Girl Crush: Lionel Messi’s New Girlfriend

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imageThe first official photos of Lionel Messi’s girlfriend have gone public via Hola! magazine

We are seriously impressed.

Not just with Lionel’s ability to rock a 1986 female gym teacher hairdo with ease down the high street, but with his stellar choice in chicas.

New girlfriend was born and bred in Argentina, is 22 years old and studies nutrition in college.

That’s all we’ve got.

But we do know this: she’s hella cute. The trainers are what did it for us. That, and the fact that her hair is ridonkulous.

Let’s all hope she can maintain this down-to-earth level of Waggery now that they’ve gone public.

image via Hola Magazine. Thanks T!

Lazy Links and Randoms

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image via ZUMAPRESS/KEYSTONE Press

Ryan Giggs signs on for another year with Manchester United; salt and pepper remain at the top of our seasoning list.

Real Madrid win bragging rights as the richest club in the world.

John Terry: he’s spikey and delicious.

Samir Nasri: definitely not going to win Man-Ho of the Year for 2009.

Cristiano Ronaldo’s latest hook up is an 18-year-old student named Olivia Saunders, who goes to Uni in Manchester. Hurrah for higher education!

Dozey/drunk/sun-sick footy fan falling down? Sure, we’ll watch that.

Happy birthday to Rafael van der Vaart (Feb 11) and also to Rodrigo Possebon and Sebastian Kehl (Feb 13). Have a good one, fellas!

Life and Love Files: Iker Casillas

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ZUMAPRESS/KEYSTONE Press

Think we’re in need of a little Iker Casillas bulleted-list life update, don’t you? Here we go:

- Iker has admitted he’s not a fan of the “Saint Iker” nickname given to him by his many fan boys and girls. Whatever, mate. It’s either that, or “Ikerette”.  Pick one and stop complaining.

- Since splitting with long-term girlfriend Eva Gonzalez, our Finest Five number 1 hasn’t hesitated to “put it out there”. First, this chick. Now, this other one. 

- Okay, okay, the new girl has a name: Sharay Abellan Colas. She’s a journalista. A few weeks ago, Iker was photographed giving her piggy back rides and kissing her. In public. (Warning, the Iker/Sharay video includes slow motion and music to further emphasis the hook up). 

- Don’t worry. We have hit women stationed outside her nail shop that will make short work of this little problem.

- But wait. Perhaps there is no problem to fix.  There have also been rumours about Iker hooking up with model Marisa Jara shortly before the piggyback incident of ‘09.

- Strangely, rather than having this news tattooed across her breastplate, Marisa is publicly stating that nothing is going on between the two of them. You know what that means? One night stand/booty call/early morning walk of shame/no returned phone calls.

- Stalkers, if there was ever a time to move to Madrid and make like a groupie, this might be it. Iker is ready for you.

- Back to footy.  Iker has just equalled the record for appearances for Real Madrid: 454. 

- He’s also gearing up for the Spain v England match on Wednesday. Will you be watching the game? Our loyalty is, of course, to England, but we have happily succumbed to the power of a sizzling Spanish side in the past.

- As you can imagine, we are beside ourselves with excitement and will be taking notes for a new line of football erotic fiction we’re working on. 

- Finally, as an FYI the above photo was taken during Iker’s current product shill for Groupama insurance. You’ve seen the ads already. We have no confirmation on the why/what/whens of the blazer.

video via ONTD Football

Good Week/Bad Week: Confidence, Cash and Crack

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copyright Studs-up.com

Whilst you browse our sum up of last week’s best and worst news, enjoy David Villa, Carlos Tevez and Craig Bellamy’s attempt to claim their own alternative facial expression titles, now that Zlatan and Nando have King of Bitchface on lock. [Cartoon exclusively for Kickette via studs-up.]

GOOD WEEK:

Chauffeurs:

Craig Bellamy has scored himself an £85,000 per week contract at City, and they’ve also agreed to pay for him to have his own personal driver. We have a newfound respect for contract negotiators.

Nouveau riche sex lives:
Good news for footy wives and WAG hopefuls: a new study shows that wealthy men give women more orgasms than poor ones.

Self-confidence in the face of adversity and bad hair extensions:
Jermain Defoe’s latest WAG, Chantelle Houghton, has publically stated that her good lovin’ might be the reason Jermain’s form has been top notch of late. Don’t mock, Kickettes. Chantelle’s hoping for marriage. She’ll need our sympathy one day. For now, just nod and smile.

Being born:
Birthday greetings to this week to Xavi (Jan 25), Jose Mourinho (today), Sebastian Giovinco (today) Jamie Carragher (Jan 28) and Dimitar Berbatov on the 30th. Party at our house, lads!
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