The Beckhams are having a girl. Iker Casillas is giving unruly bedhead a run for its money. Jack Rodwell’s mobile should be searching for sanitiser. This weekend’s gossip lacked clear direction, but made amends with Olaya Villa’s first steps forward.
- In case you missed our weekend Retweet, David Beckham told folks at an L.A. Galaxy luncheon that he and Victoria ARE expecting a girl this July. We still have sour grapes over his choice of side parts, though.
- Iker Casillas and Sara Carbonero recently celebrated their one year anniversary, Kickettes. Have a look back on their intense first year together (or just stare at Iker’s trophy-winning messy hair style; either is yours for the taking).
- Our fave stylist to the footy stars, Jada Pollock, had most of Chelsea’s first team on hand to toast to Didier Drogba at his surprise birthday celebration.
Images: WHO magazine.
Real talk, Kickettes. In this day and age of tabloid speculation, ‘baller bed hopping and random WAGabee infiltration of the clique, one constant has withstood the test of time: when one footballer’s king-size mattress share spot is suddenly taken, another is moments away from being magically vacant.
The latest news coming out of Milan – which seems to be extending these valuable words to live by’s longevity – is about Mesut Özil and Aida Yespica having a mid-February dinner date together. Gossip tells us that the two did their best to avoid the paparazzi lenses before and after mealtime, as well as while entering a club in the city’s centre through the back door. Afterwards, as we’ve heard, both parties mutually retreated to the same hotel for an intellectually challenging game of Words With Friends.
It’s hard to tell who won.
We at Kickette understand the first flushes of true love. The feelings of unbridled lust and desire that consume your soul. The knowledge that the person you have just met totally gets you in a way that no one else ever has. You know you’ll be with them for, like, ever.
It happens to us at least a dozen times a week.
We’re going to go out on a limb here and stake our Pato claim: we.don’t.get.it.
Wait! Hear us out on this one.
Much of what we are about to say is meant in the nicest possible way, but can be interpreted as a plea for help. Make us understand, Kickettes: how is this AC Milan man regularly caught canoodling with high-profile/sometimes reputable birds, regardless of how silly his nickname and attire are?
Trust, we want to be Church of Pato’s Pimpin’ converts. Amidst being left alone and afraid, though, our staff concluded that his secret sauce boils down to 2/3 cups of John Mayer-like lothario lovin’ mixed with 1/3 cup of the youngest Jonas Brother’s curly tendrils.
Yes – although we’ve wasted precious eyelid staring hours negotiating the appropriate doses of each celebrity lady killer, we really are all too lazy to give the JoBro kid a name through Google. Some things never change.
For the love of all things holy, dear readers, please submit your virgin version of his semi-sly seduction cocktail (2.5 nauseating hours of ‘Dora The Explorer’ daytime telly with his lady friend’s kids, perhaps?) or provide photographic evidence of anything other than his abs and VPL as your counter-argument.
Images: ElPais.com; Thx to Emma for the tip!
Like the ‘chicken or the egg’ theory, we face a conundrum here, folks.
Shall we be the bearers of blasphemous bulletins and admit defeat first or soften the blow with some positive peace of mind?