Osvaldo avec professional stylist = a thing of unparalleled beauty.
Osvaldo sans professional stylist = us in denial and requiring therapy.
A “must do” checklist for footballers seeking prima donna status:
- Get drunk off £400 bottles of bubbly, often.
- Go on the Z-lister pull.
Just to confirm, we weren’t in charge at the Polish National Stadium last night, we weren’t responsible for rendering the retractable roof inoperable and that wasn’t one of our man slaves in a ref costume bumbling about pointlessly in the resulting swamp.
Although you would be forgiven for thinking it was, given the level of incompetence on display.