Aleandro Rosi, now of Parma FC. You likey? Images: D&G; Marco Luzzani/Getty Images Europe.
Fans of sexy footy players lining up alongside one another, good news: D.C. United’s (newly crowned hottest 2012 MLS All-Star player by our lurvely readers) Chris Pontius will soon be standing well-chiseled shoulder to well-chiseled shoulder with Mike Chabala, whose trade from Portland Timbers was just announced. Mr Chabala stands at an erect 6’0″, is “good for the gays” says Gay4Soccer.com and has previously been lauded around these parts for his wood chopping talents and environmentally friendly fashion forwardness.
Watch this space and get to know Mike a little better, Kickettes.
Intimately if you can.
We’ve been looking for a perfectly good reason to publish this relevant interpretation of the popular ’90s game “Guess Who?”, and thanks to the comments Super Mario recently made via the press, we finally have one.
Image: Marco Luzzani/Getty Images Europe.
The players of Parma are tireless pre-season torch bearers, paving the way for all squads returning to light domestic club training. These men undergo rigorous semi-commando scientific studies annually, testing oxygen equipment, ice baths and naturally made sources of water, in order to deem these devices safe and worthy of their peers’ use.
All hail their bouncing bulge on the beach, Kickettes. For they are tightly packaged, toned wonders to behold.