Who ate so much this past extended weekend that they have chocolate oozing from their pores?
That’s a trick question, since we all know the answer. Especially the elasticated waistbands we’re bringing back for spring/summer 2010.
Not sure about you, Kickettes, but the holiday-weekend-that-was reminded us that too much family time makes us feel as crabby as Marco Borriello looks. Thank goodness for the edge-of-our-seats series of footy matches fighting for our love and attention in equal amounts as a certain great aunt with a moustache.
Since we were recklessly hungover on Monday, enjoy our abbreviated weekend results/observations/offerings today:
Since we’ve already hit a diabetic coma from the amount of Cadbury Mini Eggs we’ve scoffed (seriously, we need an intervention), we’re turning now to getting our Easter treats via fit men in bright knits. Luckily, Cristiano Ronaldo, Joe Cole and Patrice Evra’s man-candy is calorie-free.
May your long weekends be fun and footy-filled! We’ll be back to regular posting on Tuesday. Hopefully the high-Q shots of our nummy man-eggs (below) will hold you over ’till then.
Can anyone believe it’s April, already? Clearly, Cesc can’t.
Although yesterday we were recommending Abbey Clancy’s curry diet to drop a few extra kilos before the summer, we’ve since changed our minds. We are now fully on board with the Champions League weight loss method through extreme stress, adrenaline and nervous twitches. Hello, skinny jeans!
While you plan your bikini weeklies, feel free to have a look at our CL observations from the past two days. Meanwhile, we’re going to seek a live-in nurse to administer an IV of alcohol for the remaining portion of the tournament. Hey, we’re just following Lisandro’s orders to put our thinking caps on.
UPDATED: Although he “gave” us his new age resolutions, our birthday luncheon invite must’ve got lost in the mail. Snaps of the Real Madrid boys noshing at El Telegrafo Restaurante in Madrid after the jump!
At last. Finally the years of our occupation of Sergio Ramos’ manbag has paid off!
Oh, there were times we feared being coated in hair oil and sharing zipped space with misguided fashion statements would never prove fruitful enough. But on this, the day of his birth, we can exclusively reveal Sergio’s private hopes and dreams, as noted by the man himself on a screwed up receipt from Louis Vuitton.
We are honoured Kickettes. Honoured.
Champions League part 2 is tonight and Pep’s tongue is ready for action. Hee. Will Leo Messi arrive brown trousers style? Let’s hope he ditches the Mini Cooper in time as it’s seriously ruining his mojo. Let’s not go near the footwear.
- Although initial reports have Wayne Rooney’s injury taking him out for 2-4 weeks, at this stage, nothing has been formally confirmed. FYI, seeing one of the world’s best players limping off the pitch in obvious pain ranks pretty highly on our “bitch, please!” scale.
Editor Note: Kickette’s often imitated, hardly duplicated two-night results observations returns tomorrow. Expect heightened levels of manflesh debauchery.
- Sylvie Van der Vaart revealed a stunningly chic pixie crop cut – the first time she’s been out without her post-chemo wig. Rafa did it for her! Bless.
- Unsolved Real Madrid mysteries: what part of middle America is the Higuain family really from, y’all? [Photo Spot Courtesy of Don da Bola]
- Alex Gerrard says she isn’t taking diet pills. Her much-discussed clogs are from River Island.
- Francesco Totti from A to Z? Sure, we’ll take that. Twice.
- Yikes. Everton’s Dan Gosling is out for nine months with a knee injury.
- Where should Jose Mourinho go next? (We wanted to say ‘our house’, but that option isn’t available.)
- Maradona gets bitten by his dog. Can we get a reality TV show hook up here or what?
- Thanks to our astute readers, we are reminded that while Albiol celebrated the birth of his second daughter Alma in January, we had yet to see the 2-month-old out and about. The happy family was spotted in Madrid recently with their hands full of rosy pink.