A good story to tell at parties: according to Thierry Henry and Bradley Orr, it takes two hands/10 fingers to tango with a goal post.
Show of hands for those who wouldn’t mind being that bit of post Henry’s feeling up?
Before we head off to shock treatment therapy, we wanted to provide these images of Real Madrid’s Iker Casillas and his girlfriend, Sara Carbonero so they can burn themselves on your brains.
Still conscious? Thank the lovely Marion from Bellazon for the images of a loved-up, snuggle-faced Iker that will forever live on in your Pastasauce psychosis.
More below. They look really, really happy, don’t they?
We’ve been revelling in the glory of Didier Drogba and his muscle groups all day. ‘Nando Torres proved that less can be more, and when we found this video of Cesc Fabregas it felt like Christmas, birthdays and London Fashion Week all rolled into one.
Let’s check in on the pitch ‘n bitch action from this weekend:
However. We suspect that our true response would be rather more like that of our friends at Hola Valencia. They’re just honest enough to admit it. Dammit.
Speaking of getting close to players, we have to say we rather like the new scheme Kansas Wizards have implemented to ensure their players and staff get to know each other intimately.
In the hope it catches on, we have submitted our applications and hope to be hearing from the Real Madrid ground staff department in due course.
Prior to Chelsea’s Stamford Bridge clash with Inter this evening, Jose Mourinho has maintained a characteristic silence. Yeah, right. The man is a master at the veiled insult. We’re so in his thrall.
Slightly less subtle in his methods is Valladolid’s Cesar Arzo. We know Guti is capable of some quite spectacular fashion offences, but this is hardly warranted, now is it?
Sartorial choices weren’t high on the agenda at Theo Walcott’s birthday party either, although we are not aware of any similar grabbings. We won’t critique, it’s just too easy. Suffice to say, if you’re going to wear those trousers, Gareth Bale, please ensure you’re standing at a safe distance when Theo blows out his candles.
However. Things used to be worse. A great deal worse. We advise that you do not, under any circumstances, click on the Gazza clip. Just don’t.
Bad week for Phil Brown, formerly of Hull City. We get the impression that the guys at WAATP are not saddened by this development. You?
And really, really bad week for us. We’ve just got over the whole Iker/Carbonero are they/aren’t they thing and now this happens. Emotional outlook: overwrought.
And finally, props to Ciacha.net who have very kindly supplied some pictures of Gonzalo Higuain in various states of undress (just to cheer us up). Please enjoy and remember: We are Kickette and we do it. So you don’t have to.
Do you think his shirt smells like Euros? Millions and millions of Euros? It’s either that or strawberries. Regardless, it’s fantastic.