Before we head off to shock treatment therapy, we wanted to provide these images of Real Madrid’s Iker Casillas and his girlfriend, Sara Carbonero so they can burn themselves on your brains.
Still conscious? Thank the lovely Marion from Bellazon for the images of a loved-up, snuggle-faced Iker that will forever live on in your Pastasauce psychosis.
More below. They look really, really happy, don’t they?
Glad to see that magic lamp we invested in has granted our ‘more ballers flashing the flesh’ wish.
We’ve been revelling in the glory of Didier Drogba and his muscle groups all day. ‘Nando Torres proved that less can be more, and when we found this video of Cesc Fabregas it felt like Christmas, birthdays and London Fashion Week all rolled into one.
Let’s check in on the pitch ‘n bitch action from this weekend:
If we were this close to David Villa, we like to think we would maintain an image of calm serenity whilst looking hot as hell and surreptitiously passing him our contact deets.
However. We suspect that our true response would be rather more like that of our friends at Hola Valencia. They’re just honest enough to admit it. Dammit.
Speaking of getting close to players, we have to say we rather like the new scheme Kansas Wizards have implemented to ensure their players and staff get to know each other intimately.
In the hope it catches on, we have submitted our applications and hope to be hearing from the Real Madrid ground staff department in due course.
Prior to Chelsea’s Stamford Bridge clash with Inter this evening, Jose Mourinho has maintained a characteristic silence. Yeah, right. The man is a master at the veiled insult. We’re so in his thrall.
Slightly less subtle in his methods is Valladolid’s Cesar Arzo. We know Guti is capable of some quite spectacular fashion offences, but this is hardly warranted, now is it?
Sartorial choices weren’t high on the agenda at Theo Walcott’s birthday party either, although we are not aware of any similar grabbings. We won’t critique, it’s just too easy. Suffice to say, if you’re going to wear those trousers, Gareth Bale, please ensure you’re standing at a safe distance when Theo blows out his candles.
However. Things used to be worse. A great deal worse. We advise that you do not, under any circumstances, click on the Gazza clip. Just don’t.
Bad week for Phil Brown, formerly of Hull City. We get the impression that the guys at WAATP are not saddened by this development. You?
And really, really bad week for us. We’ve just got over the whole Iker/Carbonero are they/aren’t they thing and now this happens. Emotional outlook: overwrought.
And finally, props to Ciacha.net who have very kindly supplied some pictures of Gonzalo Higuain in various states of undress (just to cheer us up). Please enjoy and remember: We are Kickette and we do it. So you don’t have to.
Do you think his shirt smells like Euros? Millions and millions of Euros? It’s either that or strawberries. Regardless, it’s fantastic.
Gaaargh. How do we even begin to describe how the news from Milan of David Beckham’s Achilles injury has left us feeling? Curtains are drawn, two (okay, three) tubs of Ben and Jerry’s have been devoured, and Kleenex supplies are in desperate need of a refill. Teary and sleepless, we spent the night wishing for a fairy godmother to wave her wand and bring Becks to the ball South Africa.
We all know football can be a cruel game, but when it shatters the dreams of an Armani-modeling, free-kicking legend we have some serious issues with it. And we know how it feels to have our dreams torn up and thrown in our face; we still haven’t recovered from seeing Fabio Cannavaro make an honest woman out of Daniela.