After approximately twenty first half minutes of nail biting tension, Chelsea FC stormed to the EPL title yesterday afternoon, putting eight past a 10-man Wigan Athletic at Stamford Bridge.
With the matter firmly out of Manchester United’s hands, a simple 1-0 would have sufficed for the Blues, but we like to think they had half an eye on the Kickette coverage and scored a cheery eight to maximise their goal celebration potential.
And maximise it they did.
We’re clawing at what we’ve got left in the regular club season since the time between now and the World Cup will be sub par in terms of Speedo fulfillment. Which, we guess is okay, since June and July will provide us with more footy excitement than we’ve seen in four years.
Here’s the top match results we caught this week:
Image via Reuters
Though some may say the Europa League lacks the luster of a leather couch, we were ready to embrace watching this “consolation” cup once we opened our eyes to Fulham’s inner beauty…’ya know, the abs beneath the surface layer kit.
As such, we’re fine-tuning our attractiveness analysis to include a grandfather clause: teams that aren’t top of the hottie totty food chain can succeed if they get naked willingly and often.
For example, while Fulham may not be as collectively pretty as Fernando Torres in the stands, they peel off the layers come crunch time. Thus, we are claiming partial victory on our long-held footie results system: the universe (justly) rewards the better-looking amongst us; it also rewards those that remove their clothing to give their abs some air. Facts are facts.
Kickettes, will you be watching the tournament’s finals? While the only English team left standing in Europe will be in our hearts, Atlético Madrid’s Diego Forlan and his abs will be in our loins. (Oh and there are many, many more shots if you’re so inclined.)
Provocative sniping, threats, random, unsubstantiated bitching, and the odd punch up.
Yes folks, another typical evening in the carnival that is Jose Mourinho’s career has passed and Inter Milan’s 3-2 aggregate win over Barcelona last night was sufficient to take them through to final in Madrid on 22nd May. Barca took it with good grace, switching the pitch sprinkler system on while Inter celebrated. (cheque’s in the post, guys!)
They will face Bayern Munich, whose 4-0 aggregate win against Lyon in Tuesday’s semi was a quiet affair in comparison. Alright, there may have been the occasional highlight.
So, while we are sad to see the departure of lovely Pep, Bojan and Zlats (left) et al and some are saying that the line-up is not a victory for attractive football, we feel we can live with it. As for the result, Mourinho isn’t in doubt. He’s got connections, y’know.
Your thoughts, Kickettes?