Fresh off vacay in St Tropez with his family, the scars from Eric Abidal’s suddenly scary tumor operation last season are now available for more thorough inspection on the cover of GQ Italia‘s August issue.
As with D.C. United’s Charlie Davies and his healed-but-not-forgotton body of work, we’re unable to piece together coherent thoughts or verbal commands with the exception of, ‘oh hell yeah’.
Yann Sommer, where have you been all our European U21 Championship-tracking lives? Your epic Swiss prettiness makes us feel like someone accidentally let us out of our insane asylum (Kickette HQ) for the night after a multi-year stint in solitude. Each of us has our own personal fantasy of what we’d do to a face like yours, but because our game of Rock, Paper, Scissor has ended in a stalemate 10 times over, we’ve yet to determine which ravenous staffer gets the privilege of carrying out their ONS fantasies. With or without your parental consent forms.
Kickettes, are our urges universally-shared? Any one else want to try jockeying for a piece of the action?
Crikey, Kickettes! It’s a happy family epidemic!
Having gorged yourselves yesterday on the nummy-ness that is the Kaka fam, please now make room for dessert. We present the van Persies frolicking in the azure blue waters of Fuerterventura. We love summer, don’t you?
Time for a contest, Kickettes!
Anyone who correctly guesses the weight of Serio Aguero’s diamond huggies in carats (without going over) will win a box of Cesc’s cookies and bragging rights that we’d advise against sharing in circles outside of our own. Mainly because we think those small-minded peeps who scoff at your football fandom will call you ‘weird’ and say you have too much time on your hands.
We, however, will geek out with you about your computer monitor’s ability to micro-zoom and celebrate your footballer-lovin’ tendencies with virtual high fives because we’re loyal to our mates like that.
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