We’re making it a point to not mention the England/Israel game this weekend. Because, yeesh, why bother. We also won’t mention that Chelsea’s Frank Lampard hasn’t scored an international goal since Thriller was in the charts.
Instead, we’re going to focus on the positives: when he’s doing all that non-scoring, Frank can dodge a mean fist and hand out credit cards whilst wearing silver shoes.
And? He can blog.
Since we discovered Frank’s guest blog on Orange Sport, we can’t stop imagining Frank pouring out his heart on a new MacBook Pro in a pair of boxers, cup of milky tea at his side, marble fireplace set to moody reflection, but in reality he’s probably dictating it to one of his reps whilst on the treadmill at the club. Which is actually equally stimulating.
But let us get to the writing. Although Frank doesn’t have a natural way with words, reading his posts give an interesting, albeit edited, look into the world of the Lamps:
He’s superstitious, throwing away his boots after a particularly bad match, and always putting his right boot and right pad on first.
He’s listening to Razorlight and a mix of R&B in the dressing room.
“Being a parent, though, has certainly changed my priorities. It makes you less selfish. I used to come home from training, flick the telly on and do my own thing. Now I’m really excited to come home from training to see my child Luna. I love being with her, she makes me laugh. My priority has completely moved to her and my girlfriend.“
After reading the above, we have to bring out the phrase we swore we would never, ever, use in this lifetime. But it has to be said:
Loving the Lamps right now, Kickettes. Loving the sucky international that is the Lamps.