'Product Shill' Category

Product Shill: Iker Casillas Helps Launch… A Razor

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Oh, the irony. Never mind, we all know Iker’s got the skillz to shill for the billz.

Btw, you saw his gal Pastasauce’s comment on Cristiano Ronaldo, right? (“… Ronaldo has always been, is and will always be individualistic and selfish on the field.”) Let’s assume that quote was taken out of context.

We’re off to buy 400 crates of razors! Iker said so; it shall be done.

UPDATE: Watch Sara Carbonero eat it at her Pantene event today.

UPDATE 2: Here’s the shot.

Kickette Catch Up: Weekend Gossip Cheat Sheet

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EPL Wag Van der Vaart

What went down this weekend goss-wise that you need to know about? Let’s take a keen look, as directed by Sylvie. Image: Facebook.

Saturday

Rafael van der Vaart's WAG- Prior to the weekend kicking off in grand, drunken fashion, Sylvie van der Vaart played it smart by showing off new shots from her campaign for Gillette razors. And when we say, “played it smart”, we’re referring to the shirtless male she’s posing with. (Ed Note: more stylish snaps of non-shilling Sylvie can be seen here).

- Argentinian glamour girl, Luciana Salazar, stripped down to share her side of the Iker story. For those not willing to tamper with their 20/20 vision, Salazar denied tabloid that she got her fugly paws on this hot piece of Mancandy.

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Full Length Product Shill: Cristiano Ronaldo for Armani Jeans

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Since this just wasn’t enough, here’s the full version. Also, he has new hair. Pass the popcorn.

Cristiano Ronaldo: How To Best Market This Man

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At the launch of his new ad campaign for  Time Force watches, Cristiano Ronaldo mishears the instruction to ‘watch the clock’. Too far? We can’t help it, it’s how we roll. Image: Bauer Griffin via Zimbio.

We do so love a Cristiano Ronaldo product shill. Nine times out of ten it involves him in a bed or half nekkid. The Timeforce watch advert involves both. Click to view, and then weigh in on this “artsy cum Gianni Versace mansion” style promo.

Our take: few footballers have the bod and ‘tude of Mr. Ronaldo: why try to make him avant garde and unusual? He’s not someone we need to spend hours with analysing layers. He’s someone we need to spend hours with… getting intimately acquainted with his left hip dip.

For shame, marketers. In this economic environment, doing anything other than showing Cris in his pants is a pointless waste of resources that could be spent on body oil.

Further proof: Take it from Armani, who knows how to work with his subjects. (Warning, don’t watch this video if you need to get any work done today.)

Product Shill: Coleen Rooney For Littlewoods

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WAGs product shill

Images via Littlewoods.com.

First, it was Claudine Keane’s “look away” which proved distracting in her Ultimo lingerie ads and now it seems the lovely Coleen Rooney has fallen victim to a similar model pose plague: right arm resting syndrome (RARS).