'Property Watch' Category

Lazy Links & Randoms



Cassie Sumner has sold a tell-all to get some publicity for her upcoming autobiography. Here’s a tip, lovie: don’t confess to snorting horse tranquillizer or being paid for sex “by accident”. Doesn’t really make any of us want to buy the book.

Roman Abramovich: still offensively wealthy. He’s just submitted plans to build/convert a £150 million townhouse in Lowndes Square, which will become the country’s most expensive home.

Proving yet again that being attractive is beneficial to career success, even amongst your peers, Cristiano Ronaldo and Cesc Fabregas took home the top PFA Player of the Year award on Sunday night. Congrats!

Hmm. We’d probably go to court over our right to keep a DNA-infested Beckham jersey too. You never know what science will be able to clone one day.

Quote of the Day: Victoria Beckham on LA Property



“A lot of the houses I looked at were really garish – lots of gold, all very Versace. Believe it or not David and I do have good taste. I like everything to be simple and plain.”

We’re going to hazard a wild guess that of all people you don’t want to make enemies with, it’s Donatella Versace. She’ll slap the fake tan off you faster than you can say ‘St. Tropez spray’.

WAG Watch: Victoria Beckham Signs The Papers



We can all rest easier, take that vacation, and just exhale, now that the Beckhams have found a house in LA.

Victoria flew into LAX on Saturday to take care of business and sign the contracts. Question: couldn’t they just have the paperwork faxed over? Did she have to fly to LA in a nippletastic outfit?  Perhaps that was included in the contract terms.

The house costs between £10 -£15 million and was described as “modern, airy, very light and spacious with lots of windows,” by a source close to the Beckhams. Let us state for the record that we sincerely hope no one paid that source for this useless piece of information. Isn’t that description fairly gosh durn obvious?

Perhaps if that wasn’t put on record, many innocent people would be concerned that the Beckhams would choose a hovel with no windows and an outdoor loo as their place of residence in LA.

If anyone would like to hire us for some expert insider quotes, please take this one as an example of our skillset: The Beckhams bought a house they really like. It is big.”


Property Watch: Neville Neville Land



Usually Gary Neville flies under the Kickette radar.  Unless he’s doing something related to his best bud, David Beckham, we’re not really that bothered.

Because he’s not good looking.  Just google him, you’ll see.

However, today an exception will be made, because Mr. Neville has impressed the pants off of us. And we’re not even talking about his £80,000 a week salary.

Not only is he building a 12 bedroom mansion in Lancashire with no expenses spared in order to host his upcoming wedding, he’s levelling historic 16th century properties in order to do it. Buh bye old ass relic of history, hello £6 million golf course, stables, cinema and other such necessary goodies.

Neville has nearly 200 builders hard at work on the site to get it ready for his marriage to Emma Hadfield on June 16th – he’s promised to carry her over the threshold of their new home, so they better get their hustle on. The pair will be start the ceremony at Manchester Cathedral before heading to the new diggs, where insiders say James Blunt will be performing. No word on whether ear plugs will be provided.

Link: United Star Builds A Stunning £6 Million Home

property watch: wayne rooney


Wayne Rooney has just bought a