So, wow, there is like, nothing happening in the world of football. Other than the odd pre-season training and MLS suspension, obviously. But in terms of some good gossip, quality photos of thunder thighs, or just a nice shot of a WAG getting out of a limo without knickers on, we’ve got nothing.
Okay, so we did read how 37-year-old Alessandro Nesta is relocating to Montreal to play for the Impact next year. And how him signing for the Canadian club will allow him to high five his fellow hottie Italians Marco Di Vaio, Bernardo Corradi and Matteo Ferrari on the reg.
Still. We have the ability to exist for years solely on jam sandwiches and photos of David on all fours, but this all rings hollow for us today.
Kickettes, is the ennui of the looming transfer window making you insane yet? Luka Modric to Real Madrid? Olivier Giroud to Arsenal? Jordi Alba to Barcelona? Robin van Persie to ____? Someone put us out of our misery until late August? Please?
We thought we were still suffering from jet lag induced double vision when we saw this picture of Uruguayan teamies Edinson Cavani and Diego Lugano hanging out on the beach in Miami.
Luckily a couple of our HQ whipping boys had enough about them to fetch a large net, and the pair are now boxed up and travelling in a badly driven van towards Kickette Island where we intend to give them a thorough debriefing.
This may take awhile, so if we’re not back by tomorrow, keep on waiting.
Steven Gerrard (his abdominals – holler) and his wife of five years, Alex, spent the weekend partying it up at the Encore Hotel’s pool in Las Vegas. Images: Daily Mail.
We’ve had an epiphany, dear readers: all the mocking and wondrous delight we take in fash-bashing Alex has been a terrible, childish mistake.
We need her and her WAGtastic ways. We couldn’t make it through the dark days of the well dressed and the modest without this woman. With so few things in this world that are dependable, Alex has always come through for us, waving the WAG flag of orange skin, French manicured falsies and teflon hair-do’s consistently and reliably.
Not many out there have this skill, and it’s time we recognise this.
One of these players has the largest feet on Montpellier. The other, the smallest.
Is it true what they say about a man’s shoe size, Kickettes?