Astrological-minded Kickettes are you out there?
The latest analysis of the upcoming semi-final between Chelsea and Liverpool uses the birth signs of Avram Grant and Rafa Benitez to determine which manager will have the mettle to guide his team to victory. No, seriously.
Using Chinese and Western astrology, celebrity astrologer Paul Watson says that Chelsea’s Grant is a “lovely fellow, a sweet good natured Taurian.“ Alas, by nature of the day he was born, he is a “worrier” and is weak in the face of criticism. Benitez, the Aries “metal rat” (huh?), is “fantastically inflexible” and not strong enough to lead his team to a win.
Enjoy the random star-crossed entertainment below and let us know who you predict will go through to the final.
Link: Avram the Wood Goat video
Link: Win Tickets to the Champions League semi-finals
We’ve yet to hear back from one of our three ICON competition winners. If the winning Kickette doesn’t get in touch within the next week, we’ll have to award a subscription to someone else. Playing hard to get in this instance is not a positive. Double check your email including junk folders, pls and thank you.
Since we had such a great response from everyone on our ICON survey, we’ve sent the man-servants back into the email abyss to pull another four names to giveaway some makeup gorgessity from two of our favourite beauty brands, CARGO Cosmetics and Benefit. Obvs, we appreciate that you’re all gorgeous already, but whatevs. Prize winners have been emailed.
Winners of the Go Fug Yourself competition have been selected and notified. Congratulations!
If you haven’t won you can order the Fug Awards book directly and enjoy the snarktastic, albeit paid-for goodness. Alternatively, you can also serve yourself up a large glass of misery martini or drown your sorrows in chocolate truffle ice cream. And don’t worry, we’ve got lots more good stuff coming your way. We can’t say it enough: we are thrilled to have you all as part of our ever-growing family of Kickettes and we believe deeply in the importance of the freebie hook up.
If you’re still exiting a nightclub using your feet, you’re obviously of the steerage class. Please, take inspiration from Mr. Pidgeley and his unfortunately stretched Calvins. Walking is for suckers.
Cheryl Cole is “available”. At least she is in the new Black Eyed Peas video. A cheeky sense of humour, or is this the end for her and Ash? Also, how uncomfortable does everyone look watching CC “break it down”? Image thanks to our main squeeze, Matt.
Winners of the ICON comp, you have been emailed… check your inboxes.
Coleen McLoughlin as Audrey Hepburn. No, really. They’re like, fashion icon twins, seperated at birth. And by several decades. And actual style.
We want to stop reporting on Jermain Defoe’s love life. We really do. But we keep typing and linking. It’s a sickness and we need help. But before we seek it, we’ll let you know he’s hooked up with BB “star” Aisleyne. We’re going to quit now, really.
“Some people plan it all. Their PRs tell the papers which club they’re going to, or which shops their missus can be seen walking out of. It’s part of a whole lifestyle. People like Jodie Marsh and Danielle Lloyd are driven by it – they crave being photographed. I know there are people who could arrange things for my missus if she wanted to raise her profile. If I wanted to be known as the DIY King I’d just set it up for me and my girlfriend to get papped going into B&Q.“
Link: The Secret Life of a Footballer