Kickette.com – Soccer/football gossip, hot players, WAGs that love them

WAGs and Becks: Lazy Links

Melanie Slade is in Closer magazine this week looking nicely Stepford Wives with Twiglets for Arms Robotomatic Dolly.

If you want to download and read the Deadline magazine section of Closer, click here. 

Deadline is part of a reality tv series that we really wish we cared about but the weather is nice, work is kicking our asses and c’mon, we have a thigh competition to judge.

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Coleen is launching a “luxurious but affordable” brand, called “Coleen”. This summer we’ll be treated to her first perfume, possibly titled: “I’m Rich, Bitches!“ or “How To Create A Whole ‘Lotta Sumpthin’ Out of Nothin’”. 

In other Col news, her first television show (she’s contracted with ITV to do reality-based programming around her life until 2009) is going to be gracing UK screens soon – it’s all about Coleen grooming a group of aspiring models with grooming tips while she zzzzzzzz….  Link: Coleen McLoughlin’s Beauty Line

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Closer also makes a compelling photographic example that Joe Cole’s lady, Carly Zucker, has lost the badunk from her trunk and is getting too skinny. 

Forget that.  Our question: Is there ever a time, a moment, a place, that Carly Zucker doesn’t have her midriff uncovered? 

We’re down with a little midriff, but this is like 80s Let’s Get Physical 20 Minute Workout Style midriff.  In fact, it’s not a midriff, it’s a ribriff. 

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David has shaved his hair off.  Rapidly changing hairstyles as a sign of an unstable marriage and the need to move in with the editor of Kickette: Discuss.

Posh Links

image: Life & Style

£4,000 a month posing as the poshed one, but spends about £70,000 a year keeping up with Victoria. We’re not math genuises, but isn’t that leaving you out of pocket by a good twenty-odd grand? Isn’t that money you could spend renting a small studio flat near Freddie Ljungberg and stalking the crap out of him instead?

Link: She’s Spend 70K to Look Like Posh

READ MORE

Beck Talk: David For Charity

Watch David Beckham’s American Idol spot for Malaria – and donate if you can at www.malarianomore.org.

Random note: last night we had such a sizzling dream about Sir Becks that we’re struggling to accept and/or deal with functioning as per normal today.

Crikey, it was a good one.  Slightly disturbing as it involved both Posh and David, but we’re going to move swiftly past that by having a large fry up for breakfast.  Anyone want to guest blog whilst we recover in a cold shower? 

More to come on Kickette later today.

Lazy Links

It’s one of those days where every news story we read annoys the crap out of us.  Or, perhaps we’re just very hungover.  Regardless, it can only mean one thing:  a lazy link day.  Enjoy the randomness.

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Peter Crouch was spotted coming to collect a very drunk Abigail Clancy from the BabyCream bar in Liverpool. Abi’s on the cover of this month’s Arena.

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Charlton’s Marcus Bent is getting slayed on a regular basis by his team-mates after Danielle Lloyd revealed they were dating. He’s getting the whole sloppy seconds, Teddy Sherringham’s “cast off” wind up.  He’s not happy about it and has let Dani know as much.

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Victoria Beckham has been babysitting lambs for celebrity chef Gordon Ramsey.  The story has it that Ramsey asked her to give the lambs a nice space to roam on the Beckham’s country estate in Hertfordshire, and she agreed.  What Victoria didn’t know was that Ramsey plans on slaughtering the lambs to use for meat in his one of his reality TV episodes of The F Word.  The Mirror is reporting that Victoria will be horrified as she is a staunch vegetarian and anti-fur individual.  We’re sure we’ve seen stories about Victoria existing on a diet of lettuce and sashimi, so not sure if fish no longer qualifies as an animal or what, but Lord knows we sure can’t be bothered to research that.  Victoria’s rep said: She was more than happy to let the sheep roam around her grounds but, as a devout vegetarian, she will be distraught to learn that they’re going to be killed.“

Link: Gosh Posh They’re Nosh

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Popbitch has an interesting blind item about a footballer who hasn’t playing much this season… on the pitch, anyway.

“This footballer hasn’t seen much action on the football pitch this season but hasn’t missed out in his private life. Over Easter he was closely cuddled up to a beautiful brunette in a South London wine bar, with girlfriend and baby tucked up safely at home.“

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A variety of takes on the story behind David Beckham’s tatts. (Thanks Mary)

Link: The Secret of Beckham’s Amazing Tattoo
Link: David Beckham’s New Tattoo, A Classicist Writes
Link: Tale of the Tattoo

A source says the words, Pray For Me, on David’s right wrist is about the LA move.

“It’s how he feels about the massive move from being an English boy through and through, who has represented his country for many years and is now turning his back on England to embrace America – the move was never an easy decision and it wasn’t really David’s, it was Victoria’s from day one.  The tattoo is not something Victoria wanted him to go ahead with as she felt it would not be a good start to their time in LA, but David was adamant that he would show his true feelings about the move and stop covering it up, even if it is rather cryptic.“

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In other news, is is Friday yet?

Rio Ferdinand Gets Diddy With It

Rio Ferdinand and Diddy recently got together for a joint artist-to-artist interview for The Hook Up.

Not sure exactly how Rio qualifies as an artist, but whatevs – details, details. 

We only made it through the first five seconds of the video (discovered at The Offside), so if anything interesting happens, please let us know.  The introductions were so painful we had to go do some urgent shoe shopping to get the bad taste out of our brains.

The two are also working together to produce an anti-violence concert next year in the UK.

Link: Diddy and Rio Artist on Artist