'Randoms' Category

Nina Kristin: Meet The Playboy Model Turned Player Agent

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Nina went to Hollywood and now she’s going back to school. Kind of.

Here’s a storyline we don’t have the pleasure of reading everyday: a German Playboy model is currently working to obtain the necessary Bundesliga licence to be a registered Players’ Agent.

Even more admirable is Nina Kristin’s reasons for pursuing this career path – the 28-year-old says she merely wants to “take care” of the DFB’s top talent in the sake of their best interests.

“I have many friends who are footballers and complain that they are being ripped off. The need someone who is there for them.”

And by “someone who is there for them,” the pert pin-up really means, “someone who offers their heads large breasticles to sleep on.”

Actually, we shouldn’t mock, Kickettes. Nina’s obviously hoping for marriage here. She’ll need our sympathy some day when none of it works out.

Kickette Catch Up: Your Weekend Gossip Cheat Sheet

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Image: BERTRAND GUAY/AFP/GettyImages.

We have an announcement.

In less than a fortnight, bathing suit season will officially be over and we can eat desserts again.

So much to look forward to in September, we can hardly wait!

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Take Your Pick: Treatment Table Totty

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Gimp walkers, fear not. We still have love for you! Image: CHRISTOF STACHE/AFP/GettyImages.

As we head into one of the more exciting parts of the footie season, let’s take a moment to think of the many players who can only sit injured and frustrated on the sidelines.

From Jack Wilshere to Chris Smalling, through Martin Caceres and Julio Baptista, the list of cuties without a presence on the pitch offers plenty to choose from. Naturally, we’re waiting in the wings ready to don our nurse’s uniforms once we get the go ahead, but rehabilitating the injury-cursed back to health can’t be a one-staff show.

There’s more than enough players in plaster needing your tender love and care to go around – some may even comply with your backless hospital gown requests. So who gets your vote for the hottest hurtie on the treatment table?

Real Madrid: Is Anybody Out There?

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Henceforth, we will only refer to Mr Alonso as ‘Sabby’ Alonso.

The absolute indifference displayed by the crowd to the likes of Xabi Alonso, Sergio Ramos and Gonzalo Higuain – who were kicking field goals at halftime during a recent Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Philadelphia Eagles game – indicates an unfamiliarity with these world class players that borders on vile.

Philly and Pittsburgh Kickettes, are you out there? Please confirm that you exist and were simply too drunk or hungover that day to effectively right this deplorable wrong.

Chicharito: Flashes Of Femur Brilliance

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Images: REUTERS.

Manchester United’s squad may have its fair share of tweenies, but the ones that do reach maturity certainly know how to give good thigh.

No, seriously. We thought Chicharito’s appeal was all about his deeply set Bambi eyes and sincerely sweet smile, but this man-boy has layers, Kickettes.