- Soon to be exes, Pato and Sthefany, narrowly escaped a mucho awkward run-in with one another in Brazil this weekend. Sthef was there for modeling work while Pato was chillin’ for pleasure.
- Seeing Victoria Beckham’s extensions from all sides did not help her head’s cause.
- Does the cover of the New York Post mean “soccer” has finally arrived? If telly ratings are anything to go by, then yes.
- First, Alex Gerrard pops up in so much celeb-mimic styleys, then Posh and her thigh-highs with dresses look. Now Cheryl’s repeating shoes. Are the WAGs running out of things to wear? (Ed. Note: FYI, we won’t consider Cheryl as an ex-WAG until the divorce is final)
- Leo Messi turned 23 on last Thursday but had to wait until after Argentina’s win over Mexico before celebrating with his family and girlfriend, Antonella Roccuzzo. Miss R, who is a 22-year-old nutrition student by day, has been seen browsing South African flea markets while staying with Messi’s family in Pretoria.
Xabi Alonso explains the merits of ginger beard wearing to a correctly skeptical Fernando Torres & David Villa (Images: Reuters, AP Photos and Getty Images via Daylife)
We’ve sort of done this before, y’know. But since the World Cup kicked off (and we’ve seen fit to offer our little insights into our favourite players on various national teams), the dull roar of dissent and disappointment in the comments area has increased to such a volume we’re unable to enjoy torturing the interns with the office vuvuzela anymore.
We’ve brought you Portuguese boys, Italian macho-men, and the English crumpets we love so dearly, but it’s still not enough, really, is it? We can’t sign off on Hot NT lists without leaving you to feast upon the menu of tasty tapas that is the 5 Hottest Spanish NT players playing in the World Cup.
Fernando: Nuh uh. I won’t grow one. I won’t. I don’t care what you do to me, I will not grow any kind of beardy weardy facial hair.
Pepe: Fernando, please. It’s time to be realistic. Your haircut has taken your mojo. And us, a team run on hair! Look at me, I have no hair and I can’t get near a game. My only hope is now that Iker has shaved, he might lose his power. Either that or create an international incident getting interviewed by his girlfriend again.
Fernando: Look, I’ve just had my first grown up haircut, y’know. Don’t oppress me for finding my masculinity. Besides. Carles has enough hair for all of us.
Pepe: You’re being unreasonable. Think about it. David Villa has his soul patch and he is on fire. You have no hair and currently can’t hit a cow’s ass with a banjo. Do it for your country, boy!
Fernando: (Whiny) But what about my freckles? They’re developing quite a following of their own. If I cover them up, they may rebel. And then I will be upset.
Pepe: Considering what Pique has taken for this team so far, your reluctance to even consider growing facial hair to inspire your country to World Cup glory is shallow to say the least. It’s about commitment, Fernando. Commitment. Soul patch equals goals with added bitch slap. You might as well go and play for France.
Image via Getty Images
Iker’s made friends with his razor! He’s Pepe Reina approved now.
PS: If you have to ask why this qualifies as breaking news, then you really don’t know us very well at all.
Know this, Kickettes: We may hate on Sara Carbonero’s ill-chosen footwear, but we certainly don’t put words in her mouth.
You may be surprised to learn that some tabloids do not employ story fact-checkers. Others take stories seen on blogs or forums and re-write them using Google translate with quotes that were never said.
Whatevs. Let’s get to the dramaz. By now we’ve all read, seen or heard something about our beloved “Pastasauce” and her “connection” to Spain’s loss to Switzerland. If you’re like us, you probably gave the story an eyeroll or two, made a joke or two about carbs and kept it moving.
Well, after The Times featured what we believe to be a poorly translated interview on the front page of their print edition yesterday, (taking shots at Spain’s more popular sport reporters), the country’s legion of journalists took notice.
In case you didn’t get the chance to glean the original story and/or are too lazy to sign up to read TheTimes.co.uk, the Spanish press is calling the newspaper out for:
A) Blaming Sara Carbonero for the SNT loss;
B) Claiming that the Spanish press were the ones who originally blamed Sara Carbonero for the SNT loss.