It’s the ultimate fantasy team – our 2009 picks for the hottest squad of the season.
You know, we’re feeling reflective, Kickettes. We’ve learned a lot about life, the universe and base layers over the course of making our selections. Indeed, we never thought one could become numb to abs or short tents, but it’s possible. We’re checking ourselves into a rest home to help deal with the vertigo.
Now onwards we go. Please – we implore those of you that take this type of thing very seriously (ie, everyone), to please read our selection notes below prior to sharing your feelings/having a spasm/calling the government to report us.
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This contest is now closed. EXI reveal coming shortly!
After nearly a year in the making, our Elite XI squad is ready.
Sure, it’s all a little anti-climatic now since we’ve dragged it out so long , but let’s keep going, shall we?
We thought it would be fun to have a competition for our readers to guess which players we’ve chosen for the team. The reader that gets the most number of names correct will win a copy of Grant Wahl’s The Beckham Experiment
Unless you’ve been locked inside Selfridges for the last month (lucky), you’ve already heard plenty about this book. It’s the one that caused Landon Donovan (who now has H1N1 flu, btw) to fall out with Becks. They’ve since made up. Or so they say, anyway.
All you have to do to win the book is tell us who you think made it on our squad. Not who you want on the team, but who you think we’ve chosen. We’ll give you some hints: we’ve gone for a smorgasbord of men; there will be some surprises; they all are comfortable removing their clothes in public.
Please leave your answers below, contest closes at 11.00 EST on Monday August 17, when we will throw up our choices for 2009. If two readers leave the same (correct) answers, we’ll be holding a mud wrestling tie-breaker to determine the winner. Have fun!
Only one position remains to be filled in our perfectly-formed professional team of delectables.
Of course, we need a manager to lead our sizzle squad to glory, both on the pitch and in our loins. But who? Such a man would have not only be physically swoon-worthy of the highest calibre, but he would need to possess incredible skill, mental strength and confidence in order to not be intimidated by the full force of the pretty he was in charge of.
Also, we think he should dress like a well-tailored GQ model and have a snarl that could tame a wild tiger, but that’s just us.
Above are a few of our top choices for our (soon to be unveiled) Elite XI Squad managers – have we missed anyone? Who do you think should lead the pack?
We’ve discussed our love of hot keepers in the past, and now it’s time to re-open the debate for our compilation of the Elite Eleven.
It is, of course, obvious where our loyalties lean for the top spot, but unlike our happily biased, personal picks for the Finest Five, the Elite Eleven takes the general consensus amongst our readers into consideration as well. So, there is a possibility (however slight, we admit), that another keeper could get a look in.
Plus, the sub bench has spaces open, and looks likely to host the hottest bunch of toasty-bottomed benchwarmers in the history of those who look hot whilst seated on their perfect posteriors.
Who do you think should take the top place as the protector of our scrummy squad? We open the debate with a few for your perusal (above), but there are so very many to choose from.
Related posts:
The Elite XI: Delish Defenders
The Elite XI: Man Candy in the Midfield
The Elite XI: Sizzling Strikers
We’re nearing the home stretch in the quest to create the ultimate fantasy football team, Kickettes.
This round we’re looking at the back four, the big boys who serve and protect, who muscle, elbow and occasionally groin kick in the name of glory, the thunderous-thighed who like to rough it up.
As you can imagine, this is definitely one of our fav positions on the pitch. And interestingly, the number of hot defenders out there to choose from is staggering. Here are just a few that we love – there are many, many more. Who do you think deserves a spot in the hottest team in the world? We’re going with a 4-4-2 formation, btw.
We’ll be announcing the official Elite Eleven in a few weeks. Happy objectifying!
Link: Sizzling Strikers
Link: Man Candy in the Midfield
Remember the good old days when we used to update our features like the Thursday Thigh Off or our new Elite XI series regularly?
Hang on, let us just move this tumbleweed and kick a few crickets out of the way.
Right. Back to the Elite XI. For those who can’t recall the modus operandi of this segment, this is our version of Fantasy Football Manager and, as always, we appreciate your input on who you think should be part of the sexiest team to ever hit the playing field.
We’ve already taken your votes on the hottest strikers, and now we’re moving to our midfield.* Btw, we’ll reveal who we’ve selected at our gala unveiling once we have the entire team selected. We’re assuming this will be a matter of national news.
Who would be top of the midfield list on your fantasy footie team? Please remember, actual footballing talent is irrelevant; we want to reward only the pretty.
Sidenote: we hope all of our dear readers know that the Kickette Army’s opinions on hotness and notness, in particular with our Elite XI, do not go unnoticed by the media.
*Can we get a poll on whether we should include wingers in the striker or midfielder category?
Hallelujah, it’s the start of the season.
Time to play Football Manager, Kickette-style, and it’s a true fantasy league we’re building: the hottest team to ever grace the pitch.
Team affiliations have no relevance here; it’s all about creating a supremely talented universal force of pretty that wins games with ease, skyrockets to the top of the table and battles against the evils of the unattractive at the same time.
We’ll be making our men-as-objects-selects every Friday at irregular intervals in our quest to create the Elite Eleven for the 2008/09 season. We’ve included a few above to get you in the mood, but there are so many to choose from it’s not going to be easy.
Enough chit chat: tell us who you fancy as the hottest striker out there.
UPDATE: We’re going with a 4-4-2 formation, and you’re free to nominate any hot striker you see fit for the task.
FYI, We’re open to suggestions from our always astute and foxy readers:
- Would you like us to have both an EPL Elite IX and a ROW Elite crew, or just one universally sexy squad?
- Should we follow the much discussed 6 + 5 rule?
- Do we stick to the standard five subs, or have a few back up hotties per position?
- or, should we just clone Iker Casillas and put him in every position and call it a day? Do tell.
It’s the ultimate fantasy team – our 2009 picks for the hottest squad of the season.
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