Kickette.com – Soccer/football gossip, hot players, WAGs that love them

Elen Changes the Locks

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Elen Rives, fiancee and mother to Frank Lampard’s children is reportedly changing the locks on their London flat after the Vegas tales of scandal and ho-dom (or in simpler terms, Frank’s
Skanky Ho-chasing Ass Behaviour) were published.

Since the story went public, Elen hasn’t been seen wearing her engagement ring, and the Daily Mail says she’s been sorting Frank’s clothes into throw away piles and put the word out to him that the locks will be changed upon his return from pre-season training in LA. 

One of the many frequently available sources said:

“She went berserk when she saw the newspapers and she’s wasted no time in making Frank look and feel stupid about what he is said to have done. She is claiming she is going to change the locks at the house so that he can’t get in. She is trying to frighten him and make him feel bad.“

Take note of the key words, “trying to frighten him”.  In other words, shes. not. leaving.  The gravy train is still in the station. 

The Sun says Elen told a cousin in Spain, “At the moment everything is fine — we are not splitting up. But Frank is in the last chance saloon.”

Correction, the gravy train is not scheduled to go on any form of a journey at any time soon.

Side note: what more needs to happen, if this situation has only put Frank in the “last chance saloon”?

The couple’s youngest daughter, Isla, is just seven weeks old, and though we’ve never been a big Elen Rives fan, we would happily give Frank a drop kick with our Manolo’s on her behalf. Then again, with the state of her hormones at the moment, she might be up for doing that herself.

One can dream.

Link: Elen- It’s Frank’s Last Shot
Link: Lampard’s Fiance Changes The Locks

When Cristiano Met Bipasha

This weekend, whilst Gemma Atkinson and Alan Smith were busted for some potential tawdriness, Cristiano Ronaldo – Gemma’s supposed boyfriend – was also up to no good, hooking up with Bollywood star Bipasha Basu in a nightclub in Belem, Lisbon.  The two were partying together in the VIP section at the launch event for the “new” Seven Wonders of the World.

Totally random event we think we might have nixed in favour for jammies and a face mask, but hey, rampant lust wants what it wants.

Unlike the Gemma/Cristiano relationship, where any photos published of the two look severely doctored by the internet photoshop crew of right-clickers, these photos of Bipasha and C-Ron look like the real deal to us. 

Another example of the Gemma/Cristiano relationship being a fake, or an infidelity coincidence?  Your thoughts on the matter?

Link: Cristiano Ronaldo Gets Close and Personal
Link: Cristiano Ronaldo Gets Cuddly

Hoochie City Open for Business

We continue our updates with a WAGfest of ho’s, hoochie mamas and skanks.

Two stories are out today about Cristiano Ronaldo‘s girlfriend (?), Gemma Atkinson and Danielle Lloyd (soon to be christened she-who-shall-not-be-named).

Apparently Gemma Atkinson has been getting it on behind Ronaldo’s back with fellow Man U mate, Alan Smith.  Smith would make late night booty calls to Gemma when his girlfriend Holly Worthington was away, and Gemma would sneak over to Smith’s apt.  Gemma is reportedly desperate to hang on to Ronaldo (duh) and has been trying to keep things on the hush.  She’s denied all allegations.

We say: everything we hear about this girl is a) gross b) skankalicious and c) probably a lie, so proceed with slagging her off with caution. 

As for SWSNBN, Danielle Lloyd, believe every nasty story you hear, this girl has issues.  Latest is that she has hooked up with rapper 50 Cent, who is so into her he’s going to fly her to New York and reportedly feature her in his next video: British Wannabe Ho’s R the Best Ho’s. 

Well, we’re not sure of the exact song title, but it will be something along those lines, we’re certain.  Some say 50’s bedding technique is frequently based on telling girls they will star in his next video.

A story is also out about Danielle admitting to a passionate affair with Formula 1 driver Lewis Hamilton when she was a teenager. At the time she was two-timing him with Shaun Walker, who is currently in a Spanish jail over a gangland shootout. 

Link: Ronaldo’s Girlfriend Denies Cheating
Link: Bestotted Rapper 50 Cent
Link: Lewis Went Round the Bend

Frank Lampard: Nothing Happened, Okay?

image: news of the world

Frank Lampard seems to have gotten himself into a sticky-icky situation in Vegas. Granted, Vegas is a city built for sticky-ickys, so this should come as no surprise, really. Vegas = gambling, alcohol and women. This = a very happy place for the ballers amongst us, who have few other interests outside these areas.

Anyhoo, Lampard has been in Vegas since Weds, on a lads-only vacay with Teddy Sheringham, Wayne Bridge, and Glen Johnson.

Reports are flying that Frank hooked up with an Eastern European brunette and spent four hours with her in the private villa the boys had rented at the Wynn Hotel. Let us just mention here, the boys all had their own suites at the hotel, but booked a villa specifically for other purposes.

Says the croupier at the table where the boys were getting their gamble on:

“They were laughing about taking women back to the hotel’s Fairview Villa.

“I heard several telling girls they had their own suites, but had hired the villa for fun. They called it their ‘P*ssy Playhouse’ and were being quite crude.”

We refuse, on principle, to comment on the name of the playhouse. We simply cannot.

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WAG Watch: Noemie Lenoir

Image: Marks & Spencer

Noemie Lenoir is one of our favourite WAGS. 

Sure, we had that whole head shaving incident and now we’re dealing with an interesting choice of hair colour, but on the whole, it’s all good.

Noemie has had a career as a successful model and certainly isn’t in need of a man to pay her wages, however, we are concerned that the hair dye has gotten to her brain.

Her hubby, Chelsea’s Claude Makelele, has reportedly cheated on her many times with page 3 model Jamelah Asmar – and was even said to be high tailing it between London and Paris to keep them both happy.  Still, Noemie has stayed. 

She’s recently been quoted as saying she doesn’t mind if Claude spends lots of money on her: “If he gives Keylan (their son) a bath, that’s better than a diamond ring.“

Obviously a serious case of dimentia is occuring. 

That said, they do look good together, cheap ass gifts like time spent with your children nonwithstanding.  Quick question: isn’t time with your kids supposed to be normal, not a gift you give your wife?