'The Sizzle Query' Category

Blerim Dzemaili & Xherdan Shaqiri: Team Shirtless

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To answer a Twitter follower’s question, no we are not behind this, although we should’ve been.

Like sand in an hourglass, multi-million pound ideas like this always seem to slip through our cracks. Damn it.

Midweek Hmm: Neymar

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Dare we say he looks – gasp! – mildly good here? Pictured with Thiago Martins at a recent show of his in Brazil, Neymar also spent some time rubbing elbows with retired Formula 1 racing driver, Michael Schumacher. Image: Thiago Duran / Ag. News.

Olivier Giroud: How To Cope With A ‘He Stinks’ Brand Of Hot

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There comes a time when reality gets territorial over your shameful lust for a particular ‘baller. In a universe made up of constant media coverage, diamante-clad hissy fits and skanks that lay in wait, somethings bound to give.

But when its his professional skillz that start to slip, the effects on your libido-ettes can be devastating. Truly.

A shortlist of suggestions for working through the differences that stand in the way of you and your current object of affection – which is one of the numerous services we aim to regularly provide for our beloved readers.

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Brian McBride: Abs, Leggings, America

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Images: REUTERS.

In the spirit of the US presidential election that’s going down (American readers, do us and the cocktail party proud by voting today!), indulge in the old school abs and thighs of retired American ‘baller Brian McBride.

We can tell you the exact day Brian was removed, quite permanently, from our radar: when the photo at left was released. Can any of our Kickette historians shed some light on what in the hell was going on with the art direction of this vintage shot?

We’re open minded, but the leggings? They continue to haunt us, they do.

Pose Off: Sergio Ramos vs Leo Messi

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Sergio Ramos flexing in the above promo for the November issue of Men’s Health Espana or Leo Messi’s khaki craze for something or other. Who wins?

Well, to paraphrase Brooks of Yahoo’s Dirty Tackle writes, a ‘baller modelling clothes pales in comparison to a ‘baller modelling bulgey briefs. Thus, we gotta give this no contest to Sergio Ramos.

Betcha didn’t see that one coming.