Is a little map guiding a person on their journey to a footballer’s nethers helpfully hairy or scary? Or, would you rather lock all professional pets in the Kickette HQ loo until their bodily follicles have been spayed and neutered for good?
Benoit Costil was voted Mister Rennes 2012 this week, taking the crown from last year’s sexy stakes winner, Carlos Bocanegra, and unseating longterm Terribly Coloured Trousers titleholder, Sergio Ramos.
There’s nothing like a toned set of abs to get a healthy Kickette going. But as we learned during Mesut Özil’s ‘pouch’ phase, a taut tummy isn’t the be all and end all in your list of potential hubby requirements.
So where do we draw the line? We spent a bit of time examining this photo of Nottingham Forest’s George Elokobi celebrating a goal last weekend, and while we fully appreciate the level of work that goes into a set of muscles like this, they make us feel slightly fearful. Sharing a sofa with a man whose body resembles an antique armoire wouldn’t be comfortable and while we can’t see his thighs, we’re pretty sure they chafe when he walks.
Are these simply the minor moans of women too spoiled for their own good? Or are our fears of being crushed to death by old fashioned furniture very real to you, too?
Can a footballer be ‘too fit’?
PS: Here’s a gratuitous shot of The Ramos shirtless to get the discussion going…
Stu Holden is filming his rehab for Kick TV. Highlights include Stu falling into a pool, Stu laughing and Stu doing a multitude of other endearing things in front of his camera woman – rumoured to be his girlfriend. Kickette soldier boys and girls gather.
**Look, if you’re prepared to buy into the concept of the Kickette Men’s Underpants Research Institute, then this kind of finding will be a no-brainer. Image: AFP PHOTO/ANDREW YATES.
Based on the comments left in response to our recently tweaked F5 list, we know you lot have the superhots for a certain Welsh Gunner at the moment.
So for those who are guilty of gawking at this good looking specimen – whether directly or by association – we have the following to ask of you: if you knew that a night in the company of Mr Ramsey could result in the early demise of a public figure, would you refuse him the right to enter your personal penalty area?
Don’t be too quick to doubt the plausibility of such a scenario, Kickettes. It’s been scientifically proven** that Aaron Ramsey’s “scoring” leads to musicians, technology gurus and mad dictators biting the dust. Given his grim reaper appeal, would your naughty residual thoughts of Aaron’s bed/backseat/closet be worth the celebrity death risk?
We think we know the answer, but humour us. Our midweek hump is proving challenging.
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