'The Sizzle Query' Category

St. Patrick’s Day: Who’s Your Fav?



Roy Keane and his son at the Celtic v Rangers game in Glasgow. We think his gum is Juicy Fruit. Image via ZUMAPRESS/Keystone Press

Happy belated nearly St. Paddy’s day everyone! 

We’re still a little green around the gills after celebrating this weekend and are updating from a detox centre off the coast of Maui. 

Oh, we can’t lie to you, dear readers, we’re still under the duvet waiting for our man servants to remove our silk eye covers and put the kettle on. They don’t seem to have arrived yet.  In any case, let’s get back to the festive topic at hand: Irish footballers.

We know Roy Keane has a few fans on Kickette, as does Shay Given, John O’Shea, Robbie Keane and that cute little boy-bander, Andy Keogh.

Who’s your favourite Irishman? And did you get green this weekend in celebration?

UPDATE: So, seriously. We may need medical assistance after having no clue what actual day it is.  Please, send truffles. We may not make it otherwise.

AC Milan: Steps and Suitcases



all images via ZUMAPRESS/KEYSTONE Press

AC Milan arrived in Bremen yesterday, prior to their UEFA cup game against Werder Bremen.

We give you: Ambrosini, Beckham, Favalli and Maldini – goes without saying that macho men of the squad are all looking rather dapper with the sun in their eyes and their luggage in hand.

Oh, how we wish that bag carrier to the rich and muscular gig we applied for had come through.  Such is life.

Who gets your vote for the most attractive plane exit, Kickettes?


Baller Love: Who Would You Choose?


So, we got the idea for today’s Sizzle Query based on the different types of V-Day love we expect to receive today.  For example:

imageUnlike our long-term boyfriends, who will rush home this evening with a petrol station bouquet of flowers and a well thought out explanation of why their love for us is everlasting and doesn’t need one special day to celebrate it because every day is a love day;

And, rather unlike our booty call boys, who will throw us one of those plastic blinking roses sold at Leicester Square by carnie rejects and a box of half eaten Ferrero Rochers and then fall asleep on top of us, our new boy crushes at Unprofessional Foul politely asked us days ago if we would be their Valentine. Sweet, huh?

And then they made us a card with a shirtless Sergio Ramos, a suited Thierry Henry and a thirsty Freddie Ljungberg.  We’re positively swooning. 

“…Granted that the ladies behind Kickette are anonymous… but in our imaginations they have the looks of Sylvie van der Vaart and the brains of Frank Lampard.“


So, in keeping with the spirit of the day, here’s a question, dear readers: which baller would be your long term, booty call and boy crush?  We’ve gone with Roque, Cristiano and Bojan.

Would You: Ricardo Quaresma



Ricardo Quaresma is the new kicker on the block at Chelsea, and we’re curious to know what our readers think about the 25-year-old Portuguese winger.

Let’s keep the information/evidence short and sweet:

Pros: looks cute in hats, hip dips, thighs of glory, sweet smile.

Cons: suffers from blingerific diamond earring abuse; hair gel tends to be on the crisp side; at 5’8” he’s nearly pocket-sized.

What’s your take on Ricky Q, Kickettes? Would you?


Best Bitchface: Zlatan Ibrahimovic



image via AP Photo

We had, perhaps prematurely, declared Fernando Torres as the King of the Side Eye after witnessing his cut-glance abilities both in the stands and on the practice field.

But after spotting this pic of Zlatan Ibrahimovic in bitchface, we think Nando has some serious competition. 

imageWho do you think gives a better look of disgust with a side of judgement?

Zlatan’s “talk to the finger complete with a mocking eyebrow raise of scorn” is excellent. However, Nando’s recent “anti-Everton sneer avec stare with a side of booty pop thrown in for good measure” is equally impressive.

FYI, we’re presuming Zlatan is in a better mood now – he’s just been named as the Italian Player of the Year at the football Oscars. Congrats!

image via ZUMAPRESS/KEYSTONE Press for kickette.com