'The Sizzle Query' Category

Sizzle Query: The Mandatory Triple Challenge



Although we were somewhat amused by the story published over the weekend about a possible Cristiano Ronaldo/ Sergio Ramos/ Nereida Gallardo love triangle, we suspect it is completely fake. 

So let’s not dwell on who whatsherface may or may not have slept with in the past. 

Instead, let’s tweak this example of love amongst the ballers and head into a new, PG16-category of Sizzle Query: The Mandatory Triple Challenge.

Here’s how it works.  There are two options, and you must choose one of the following: 

A mad, passionate night of passion-filled madness featuring yourself and

David Beckham / Ludovic Magnin;

or Iker Casillas / Ivan Campo?

Which will it be?

A few sidenotes:
- We recognize that some Kickettes may find either option appealing, in which case we must ask that you excuse yourself from the enquiry and seek immediate help;  This post idea is shamelessly nicked from an archived challenge at Celeb-Alert; and we’re concerned this story may be a tad too mean and narky for a Tuesday.  Should we discontinue this line of SQ’s?

Would You? Santino Quaranta, D.C. United



Image via Jonathan Newton/The Washington Post

We may not know much about the MLS, but we commend the hiring process and priorities of D.C. United.

It was a sad, less attractive day when one of fav DC United players, Bobby Boswell, moved on to play for the Houston Dynamo, a team we know exactly nothing about, other than the fact that they may be located in Texas. If you will remember, Bobby was rated the 2006 Defender of the Year, is tall like a mofo and had no issues with going on record exclusively for us to rank the various “mingers” we had chosen for our Finest Five list.


Hottie or Nottie: Croatia’s Ivan Rakitic



photo via AP Photo

As our very astute Kickette, TFO, so wisely observed in yesterday’s balcony posting, “Does anyone agree with me that any Croatian with a surname ending in “ic” is pretty hot? I found that to be a truth yesterday.“

Agreed.  Perhaps we should start a daily Croatian sizzle query schedule. Interesting.

Here’s Ivan Rakitic at a news conference this morning.  Does the “ic” theory hold for you?


Euro 2008: We’ll Take Spain, You?



image courtesy of ZUMA/KEYSTONE Press

Hurrah, Euro 2008 starts tomorrow – bring on all that fantabulous footballing talent from Europe.  Minus England, obvs. They’ll be spending their summer tanning and shopping and all the other etcs that come with being a shite team in an international competiton.  No, we’re not bitter or weepy, thanks for asking.

It should come as no surprise that in lieu of any English talent, Kickette will officially be supporting Spain at the Euros. 

Why? Because after extensive, back breaking research we’ve determined that La Furia is the sexiest squad (after all, three out of our finest five members are Spanish): Fernando Torres, Cesc Fabregas, Iker Casillas, David Villa, Xabi Alonso, Miguel Torres and The Ramos (© LD). Pullease. Game over.

Who are you supporting, Kickettes? Anyone heading out to see the games in person? And most importantly, who do you think is the hottest squad in the tourny?

Random: more sizzle inspiration here.

Footie Love: Player Loyalty



Mmmm man love.

Wait, what are we talking about again?  Oh yes: footie loyalty.

It’s that time of the season when everyone and their mama is speculating about which player will head off for pastures greener.

We tend to get freaked out by the rumours and try to lay low until it all blows over. 

There are certain players we just can’t imagine seeing in a different jersey – Steven Gerrard, Cristiano Ronaldo and Frank Lampard, to name just a few.  We’re still not over Becks leaving Manchester United 400 years ago, but our therapist is positive we will get past this trauma at some point.

Here’s our question for those die hard baller lusters/lovers/stalkers out there: if your favourite player goes to another team, do they become ‘dead’ to you?  Of course the love of your fav team will never change, but can you separate that loyalty and still secretly (or not so secretly) watch and support the defector?