'The Sizzle Query' Category

Getting Cheeky With The Men In Red: Steven Gerrard vs Gerard Pique vs Gianluigi Buffon

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No, it’s not right nor fair to make anyone choose, but no one said a life objectifying men would be easy.

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The Sizzle Query: We’re All Ears

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One topic that was thoroughly debated over drinks by the Kickette Seriousness Institute on Tuesday: players’ ears.

To summarise, do you notice and/or do you care?

While we all want our ‘ballers to be perfect, is obsessing over their aural organs the silliest case of superficiality you’ve ever heard? Or does size and shape always weigh heavily on your discerning eyes, no matter what the body part is that they’re surveying?

Take your time and don’t rush to judgment on this one, Kickettes. We’ll be here, ready to talk OTT footballer objectification criteria whenever you are.

Injury Update: The Rise Of The Replacements

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Images: AFP/Getty.

Even more players are crocked since we last touched this topic, so this is the last time we’re going to touch it (yes, really).

We’ll give you the names of players recently injured in action, as well as the names of their replacements, and we ask that you tell us who you think is hotter. Simple as that.

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The Sizzle Query: England’s Spare Shotstoppers

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Pundits say that Joe Hart is the best goalkeeper England have produced since Peter Shilton. He’s certainly the hottest. But it’s going to take more than one pretty to prevent England suffering an ignominious exit from a major competition (again).

Naturally, we need to find out whose operating in the Furry Smurf’s foine shadow. And more importantly, which one do you fancy?

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The Sizzle Query: Terrence Boyd, USMNT

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Image: Gary Bogdon/Getty Images.

In keeping with our respect for international, local and outer space holidays, religious, public or otherwise, Kickette is “celebrating” Memorial Day with a sizzle query dedicated to the U S of A.

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