'The Thigh-Off' Category
It’s always nice when multi-tasking players like Sergio Ramos (Real Madrid) and Benoit Cheyrou (Olympique de Marseille) take hold of the Thursday Thigh-Off responsibilities for us, insisting we’re too pretty and dainty to bother lifting a finger. Very considerate of them.
Of course, with the immense quadly goodness on display today, picking a winner may be harder than attempting a drive by of the Printemps shoe department during your lunch hour. We suggest you pour yourself a drink, take the phone off the hook and get a note pad to make your comparisons.
Don’t let the happily-go-lucky lead pic mislead you: this contest is not made for the meek. In our third week of commitment to the carved legs, we aim to empower you with a wide-open, no holds barred look at the Herculean hammies of Mario Gomez (Vintage) and Maynor Figueroa (Virgin, obvs).
Ready…set…flex ‘em fellas!
Image Credit: Mike Hewitt/Getty Images Europe.
One thing readers can be assured of when it comes to the TTO 2.0 – we hear your kudos just as loudly as your complaints. And when our HQ’s honorary virtual intern*, Blake, bellowed about the lack of hairy thighs in our 2.0 logo (at left), we sought to give the guy what he wants.
Today’s Vintage v. Virgin match features the formidable flexors of two former Liverpool team-mates: Steven Gerrard’s furry femurs v. Ryan Babel’s bald bulldozers. It’s an exciting contest, one that calls for full fat microwaveable popcorn with a side of spray butter.
*Title and position have yet to be discussed with aforementioned candidate.
Phone your bosses from your lunch breaks, Kickettes, and feed them a convincing “I’m siiiiiiiick” excuse because this afternoon is finally the time for you to audit some tantalising thighs in the privacy of your own homes.
You read right: everyone’s beloved Thursday Thigh-Off competition has returned – and with a cool new logo to boot. Yeah, we tend to waste much of our time on minutiae such as this.
We’re aware that our recent production of this semi-regular feature has been intrinsically inadequate, but after coming to our senses and realising that footballers’ thighs are to Kickette what an oxygen tank is to a geriatric patient/Sergio Ramos fan girl, we’re committed to making this mentally-abusive relationship (for our writers, of course) work.
Who will emerge victorious? Who will be adorned with the Quad King moniker? Who will care? All questions will be answered.