'The Thigh-Off' Category

The TTO: David Beckham v Cesc Fabregas


Two of our favourites are in the mix for the Thursday Thigh Off competition this week: LA Galaxy’s David Beckham and Arsenal’s Cesc Fabregas.


Both come to the pitch well-armed with lean every-ready running batteries and nicely toned muscle groups. 


Click through below to see more photo evidence, winners from last week, and to leave your vote.


Congratulations to last week’s champ, David James, who comfortably took the lush Victor Valdes to school.

The TTO between Michael Owen and Owen Hargreaves was the closest in Thigh Off history. Owen Hargreaves came out ahead by just three votes.

We’d like to award this one as a tie and commend both players for their superior muscle groups and tone. Hargreaves fans, we’re sure you will strongly disagree.  Perhaps a future rematch is in order?

The TTO: David James v Victor Valdes


TGIT, dear readers.  We have dug ourselves out the backend of the new community section and we are in dire need of some thigh therapy.

Let’s enjoy the talent today, shall we?


Portsmouth’s David James is an old fav of ours. He fits all the criteria one should look for in a goal keeper: slightly barmy and tall. Works for us.  He’s enjoying the FA Cup victory and we are enjoying his hamstrings.


Alternatively, you may choose to go with Barcelona’s delectable Victor Valdes. Some say he is the poor man’s Iker, which confuses us, as we’re quite certain VV is rather wealthy himself.  Such subjective squabbles aside, we do think he is a very worthy competitor and meets the somewhat insane/height acceptable standards as well.

Who gets your vote?

The winner of last week’s TTO will be announced tomorrow. This is not due to any particular controversy nor to incite a riot.  We are still dealing with a few comment issues from the new settings and wish to be fully accurate, lest we are attacked by thigh-conscious Kickettes questioning our tabulation methods.


cheers Anna for the Keeper v Keeper tip

The TTO: Michael Owen v Owen Hargreaves



Michael Owen (Newcastle) and Owen Hargreaves (Manchester United) are up in the mix this week – both of these players have strong fan bases, so it will be interesting to see who strides to victory on this one.


images via KEYSTONE Press, Reuters and famousmales

Click through below to further examine the goods.

Michael Owen may be prone to injury, but he can still pack a wallop in those quads if he needs to. Kudos has to be given to the sheer amount of rehabilitation this man has endured – ie, those thighs have done a lot of curls and had many a massage to get them into tip top shape. Let us respect the dues these muscle groups have paid.


As for Owen Hargreaves, he does frequently partake in wearing evil base layers and has been known to combine that crime with yanking his damn socks so high we are left with less than 5 inches of muscle to observe. Let us not hold this against him. Perhaps he does this for our own protection -  seeing too much of the flesh might induce a riot, for example.


Who gets your vote?*

Congrats to last week’s thightastic victor, Habib Beye, who barely (and we mean, by five votes or so) beat Michael Ballack, who unfortunately suffered much unfair bias due to his jersey, Germaness or nipples, we’re not sure. Regardless, HB, you’re still a worthy winner, nice job!

Link: Michael Owen Official Site
Link: Owen Hargreaves Official Site

*We recognize that the zoom shot of Michael Owen in training is slightly biased – after all, most players would look fantastic in that position, regardless. So, to even things out and/or pre-empt the Hargreaves-backlash, please enjoy the attached gratuitous tum shot of MH.

The TTO: Habib Beye v Michael Ballack


Welcome to another round of the Thursday Thigh Off, please make yourself comfortable.


Up first is Habib Beye, a French/Sengalese defender for Newastle United.  Some random HB info? He has his own theme song by way of the terraces, sung to the tune of Happy Days. (Strangely we have no reports of any songs specifically dedicated to his quads, but we’re sure someone is working on that.)  When Habib first joined the EPL, he said he had to work to bulk up in order to deal with the physical side of the English game. He’s also mates with TTO winner Didier Drogba.


Habib’s competition comes by way of Germany: Michael Ballack.  Mr. B has just been offered a three-year deal to stay with Chelsea and to continue to flex and contract his thighs exclusively during that period.  Michael gives good height – he’s 6″2’, he plays in midfield and he has his own website if you’re interested in spending some clicking time elsewhere.

Who takes the title this round, dear readers?


images courtesy of ZUMA/KEYSTONE Press

Congrats to last week’s winner, the lush Paolo Maldini, who beat the some seriously thightastic competition from Micah Richards. Don’t worry Micah, you’re young, you will eventually get over this loss.


The TTO: Micah Richards v Paolo Maldini


Soz for the lateness of the TTO today, Kickettes. We promise never to keep you in anticipation of thighs again and accept it truly is unacceptable to have to wait more than 2 minutes after the stroke of midnight on a Thursday before quadly goodness is posted in rapid fire fashion.

Let’s get to the goods, shall we?


First, we have the tartan/high zip-loving Micah Richards of Manchester City. Regardless of his fashion choices, there is absolutely no denying the bod. He has more abs than anyone we know and he is terribly thightastic.  He became the youngest defender to play for England in November 2006, when he was 18 years old.


Also for your consideration is Paolo Maldini, who plays for AC Milan and has several things working for him: the eyes, the extreme amounts of cash he has amassed over the years, and quite obviously, his physical prowess.  Mr. Maldini is one of the elder statesman on the field – he’s played in eight Champions League finals.

It’s young, fresh legs full of stamina against highly experienced, finely honed ones. Who gets your vote this week?

Congratulations to the lovely Xabi Alonso for his victory over Joe Cole in last week’s Thigh Off. Sorry Joey, but you’re going to Moscow so it all evens out.