'Wedding Bells & Babies' Category

Mario Balotelli: Paternity Test, Please!

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Image: Quink Facebook.

We’ve been looking for a perfectly good reason to publish this relevant interpretation of the popular ’90s game “Guess Who?”, and thanks to the comments Super Mario recently made via the press, we finally have one.

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Kickette Catch Up: Your Weekend Gossip Cheat Sheet

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Steven Gerrard (his abdominals – holler) and his wife of five years, Alex, spent the weekend partying it up at the Encore Hotel’s pool in Las Vegas. Images: Daily Mail.

We’ve had an epiphany, dear readers: all the mocking and wondrous delight we take in fash-bashing Alex has been a terrible, childish mistake.

We need her and her WAGtastic ways. We couldn’t make it through the dark days of the well dressed and the modest without this woman. With so few things in this world that are dependable, Alex has always come through for us, waving the WAG flag of orange skin, French manicured falsies and teflon hair-do’s consistently and reliably.

Not many out there have this skill, and it’s time we recognise this.

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Pitter Patter: The Clichys, Mario Balotelli & Raffaella Fico

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As Gaël Clichy’s wife Charlene Curic demonstrates, at this stage of one’s pregnancy (i.e., more than 1 hour) shopping is the only acceptable line of work. Seen nonchalantly strolling the streets of St Tropez over the weekend, we give this pair of parents-to-be another 4 months until they’re fiscally responsible for stocking another being’s walk in closet. Other stork delivery bets from our peanut gallery?

In other Man City ‘baller baby making news, Raffaella Fico confirmed that she and Mario Balotelli are expecting a child together (the first for each). In an interview with Chi magazine, the 24-year-old says she called Balotelli the day before Italy beat Germany to tell him and “first he was silent. Then he said `you have given me the best news in the world.”’ Although she broke things off with Super Mario in April due to his lack of monogamy, Fico also predicted that he’ll be “a great father…and life partner.”

Enjoy/swoon/appreciate the baby bumps, Kickettes. And certainly don’t forget to congratulate both couples on their happy news!

Divorcing: Ruud & Estelle Gullit

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After 12 years of marriage and two kids together (Joelle and Maxim), Ruud and his third wife, Estelle, are headed to divorce court.

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Kickette Catch Up: Your Weekend Gossip Cheat Sheet

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Image: The Mirror.

Sorry we’ve been slow on the gossip cheat sheet uptake lately, Kickettes. We truly have no excuse.

But we will provide one example of the type of day we’ve been having: this morning on the tube, we saw a delectable Nemanja Vidic-type lookalike. When he stood up to get off, he swung his backpack up over his shoulder, causing his shirt to ride up, and we were gifted a flash of finely toned abs. You know how we feel about ab-flashes, yes?

But then, as he was waiting for the doors to open,  he reached up seductively… and smelt his fingers.

So, yeah. We’re still dealing with that.

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