Image via Reuters
In honour of the Danish NT’s sad departure from the World Cup, we have composed this short song about Nicklas Bendtner. Ahem.
A Man Who’s Very Tall
(to be sung raucously to the tune of Elton John’s ‘Candle In The Wind’)
Goodbye Nicky B
Though your team is out of the Cup
You had the grace to take the hit
And not look like a fool.
They said you were a bad boy
And they whispered into your brain
‘Get off the field of play…
…and colour-in your socks’
And it seems to us you live your life
Like a man who’s very tall
Never bowing to the pressure
to wear any clothes at all.
And we would have liked to have known you
(And have your kids), but
Your tourney’s burned out long before
Your legend ever will.
Seems awfully strange to have a World Cup without Italy in it anymore, doesn’t it?
Also, the idea of not seeing Canna again on the international stage may not be surprising, but it certainly doesn’t bear thinking about. Someone put this man on a stamp or something.
As you can see by the above video (from the game against Slovenia), England’s NT manager Fabio Capello is maintaining the calm, cool and collected demeanour we’ve all come to expect from him.
Meep. But also kind of fantastic, no? Goodness, this man is amped.
Above image: HOANG DINH NAM/AFP/Getty Images via Daylife.
Having already featured in our famous ‘Yes, No, Maybe So’ NT Contest and been dissed on account of an unpleasant facial hair outbreak, we feel obliged to offer the kissy love to Portugal’s Raul Meireles. Why? We feel he is a Kickette kind of man. Not afraid of a bad haircut. Likes cats and manlove. Not averse to removing clothing when the situ demands.
Kickette ladies say… Ting!