'WTF Files' Category

Andre Villas-Boas: He’s Electrifying!


As John Terry bursts into flames in the penalty area, AVB realises that he probably should have watched more Harry Potter movies before attempting to incorporate magic into his management technique. Image: AFP PHOTO/IAN KINGTON/Daylife.

After Arsene Wenger’s failed attempts to control the whereabouts of his players via GPS, we are pleased to announced that another EPL manager has embraced technology in his quest to improve his team’s performance.


Jack Wilshere: On The Nose


Image via frog.

Like Jack Wilshere, seen here testing 3D TV in his local electrical superstore, we like to remain totally abreast of all the latest developments in technology. We’ve even figured out how to type on our smart phones without breaking nails. But despite being armed with this dangerous amount of knowledge, we still have a question.

Why does a 3D TV testing station require a ‘nose rest’? Anyone?

Stefan Savic: Manchester City Mind Control


We don’t claim to know a great deal about cars, but we’ve seen enough episodes of ‘Top Gear’ between us to know that you’re not supposed to do this to a Bentley.

What on earth could have inspired is this heinous act of vandalism by Manchester City’s Stefan Savic, people? Was it Stephen Ireland’s house? Mario Balotelli’s revenge for the fish prank? Or has Manchester City’s Orwellian plot of world domination fallen off track?

We’re not sure, but whatever it is, it ain’t good.

Getafe CF Calls For Artificially Inseminated Action


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La Liga club Getafe CF are taking an entirely new approach to direct marketing for the 2011/12 season by speaking to all their male fans’ little swimmers.

The rationale is simple: when the going gets tough and the supporters get going, the only logical way to fill those stadium seats is by spreading all available seeds.

We kid you not (hee!).

For the record Kickettes, we did not help conceive (see what we’re doing here?! And it’s only Saturday!), plan or produce the above advert. But we so wish we did.

FC Köln: The Dirty Protest


Image Credit: thelocal.de. First spotted on Barstool Sports.

Austin Powers once famously enquired, ‘Who throws a shoe? Honestly?’

Well, we do, if drunk and angry enough. And in certain circumstances, we have been known to throw other things. Clothing. Handbags. Occasionally people.

But we have never, in the name of all that’s holy, thrown anything like what was reportedly hurled at Schalke 04′s poor following by FC Köln’s ‘fans’ during the pair’s Bundesliga match last weekend. With a nod to our newly formed ‘Taste & Decency Dept’, we’ve decided not to tell you what exactly *IT* is, but suffice to say it was dirty.

And wrong.