April 1st, 2010

Champions League Results: Look-A-Like Thoughts & Yellow, Non-Mellow Reactions

Lisandro of Lyon Arsenal's Cesc Fabregas

Can anyone believe it’s April, already? Clearly, Cesc can’t.

Although yesterday we were recommending Abbey Clancy’s curry diet to drop a few extra kilos before the summer, we’ve since changed our minds. We are now fully on board with the Champions League weight loss method through extreme stress, adrenaline and nervous twitches. Hello, skinny jeans!

While you plan your bikini weeklies, feel free to have a look at our CL observations from the past two days. Meanwhile, we’re going to seek a live-in nurse to administer an IV of alcohol for the remaining portion of the tournament. Hey, we’re just following Lisandro’s orders to put our thinking caps on.

Lyon v. Bordeaux

Gourcuff and Chamakh Bordeaux
Gourcuff and Chamakh. Chamkh and Gourcuff. Whatever the order, these two can be dubbed the Cristiano/Kaka of Ligue 1. Aside from looks, we mean they’re about to get bounced out of the Champions League. Lyon secured a 3-1 first leg win that they can most likely protect during the next go ’round on Bordeaux’s home turf. We’re not sayin’ it can’t be done. We’re just saying we should consider researching alternative semi-final hotties, stat.

Other notable observations: the much-discussed Frenchmen chestie besties; Lyon’s luscious lay-about; Michel Bastos as Mr. Magoo

Bayern Munich v. Manchester United

Two nights ago, Bayern Munich’s Daniel van Buyten showed Wayne Rooney just how powerful bouncing bratwurst can really be. Out for 2 – 4 weeks, we are happy to report that Rooney’s groin sideswipe (and his really-injured ankle) shoudn’t affect his World Cup squad inclusion.

Bayern Munich's Ivica OlicWhile the Munich leg belonged to the home team, we believe Anatoliy Tymoschuk (far left) belongs to the Guti team. Seriously, these two could be twins separated at foreign birth, no?

Other notable observations: Ivica Olic and New Guti went topless; Patrice Evra soared to new heights; Nemanja Vidic’s head-rubbing glee and Bastian Schweinsteiger’s stylish sideline stare

Arsenal v. Barcelona

Cesc Fabregas and Gerard Pique

Arsenal's ArshavinTennis star Andy Murray was right: what a game. Last night’s  ’09 re-match lived up to its hype and then some (possibly broken legs). Without a doubt, Kickette’s Man of the 2 – 2 match was the yellow card. Which, funnily enough, may have also served as the inspiration behind Andrei Arshavin’s bright, new highlights.

Other notable observations: Cesc Fabregas and Gerard Pique having a tender moment over their next leg dual suspensions (above); the many talented sides of Zlatan’s thighs; Thierry Henry’s return to the Emirates, much to daughter Tea’s delight

Inter-Milan v. CSKA Moscow

Zanetti Inter Milan

Don’t think we forgot that it’s Thursday. And what a better way to round out this short week than with Javier Zanetti’s quads of steel. Inter Milan hosted CSKA Moscow at the San Siro on Wednesday, and although the 1-0 result was a good one, Mourinho felt all sorts of sitting on the bench itchy.

The real star of this show, though, was Milos Krasic’s (Cska Moscow) hair-don’t (above and left). Giving new life to the meaning ‘living comb-over’, one could confuse his coiff with a flock of seagulls. He’s Serbian, ladies, and we think it’s about time he and Vida had a hair heart to heart.

Inter Milan's Wesley SneijderOther observations: Wesley Sneijder’s coy leg message and itsy bitsy tongue that failed to gain his manager’s attention; Moscow man Mark Gonzalez

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32 Responses to “Champions League Results: Look-A-Like Thoughts & Yellow, Non-Mellow Reactions”

  1. The very best to Cesc and all major contenders over the weekend.

    The weather's dreadful in London at the moment ….

  2. Inés says:

    Poor Wazza and Cescy, I hope they recover sooner than expected!

  3. Innocenza says:

    Oh Cesc. :( Not you.

    On a side note, I'm watching some '90 World Cup games, and I think it's time to petition the return of the short-shorts. I feel that the *ahem* level of play was higher. You know, to match the hemlines.

    As you were.

  4. TB says:

    2 words: FORZA INTER!!

  5. laz says:

    is there some sort of voodoo put on the english teams in the cl this yr or something? (would explain what that wizard of the oddly predicted cr injury of earlier in the yr has been up to since)

    I'm a utd fans but i will be praying and hoping that not only will utd be able to prove that they are not a one man team and more through to the semis but arsenal get the fairytale and also get that semi final place – though i am fearing the worse for both teams in next weeks matches, the luck just doesn't seem with our english teams right now and i am dreading the likely 'rubbing in our face whilst we're down' that is likely to come when we most likely get knocked out as most other teams can't really speak and it's nasty to laugh about any player getting injured – no matter what team they play for and how big jerks they portray themselves to be on the field, tbh it's a low blow!

  6. SoMysterious says:

    my gosh!!! javier’s thighs look so SEXY in that photo!!!!

  7. Hannah says:

    I didnt think it possible…actually i could lol but im more in love with cesc fabregas than ever before!! He was amazing last night and watching him staying on for the last minutes of the game made me so proud to be an arsenal fan…he showed true courage and determination to stay and fight with his team…managing to run on a broken leg wow thats all i can say. SO everyone…its about time you all took notice.. Arsenal have team spirt and are not backing down in the title race! …love you cesc :)

  8. Linda (Gooner till I die) says:

    Well, I don’t know what to say. I’m still shaken. We were completely outplayed and outclassed by clearly the best team in the world and still managed to get a draw (I hail our IMMENSE team spirit). But this result has cost us dearly – Cesc out for the season as well as Billy Gallas. And Shava is injured, too. F**k !!! I swear I have no idea what we’re going to do… :-(

    on a positive note – I think I’ve fallen in love with Pep Guardiola :-)

  9. Ana;) says:

    The game was too much for me yesteday! I nearly had a heart attack everytime Barca were on the ball.

    It sucks that Cescy is out, but we knew it would be a possiblity I guess. We played him, and now he's out.

    Bless him he really wanted to play, just shows his fighting sprit. I could help but awww him, as theo said he was a "solider". The yellow card doesnt matter, although he was devastated we all knew he wouldnt play the second leg.

    Hopefully we can go to Barca and get something, I dont want us to be outclassed again =[ We're better then that.

    We've got to stretch Valdes more…I want to see him stretch to save, especially so we can get a peek at his abs!!! :)

  10. MrsNesta says:

    Recovering from my hangover, and can’t believe Cesc out for 6 weeks, am gutted for him and for Arsenal. What a game, was very stressful watching it but had a couple of moments of checking out the talent and was trying to work out who was taller Bendtner or Pique?

    • Molly says:

      Eww yeah alcohol in the house during big football games is dangerous. Hope you feel better!!

      • MrsNesta says:

        Thanks Molly, just about ok now, glad no work tomorrow :)

        • Molly says:

          Your welcome MrsNesta!!! :) . My bf went out and watch the game yesterday with his friends and didn’t get home until wee hours of the morning, he is hungover still and its bed time lol poor thing. But have a good day off!!!

  11. Alessandra says:

    abbey’s mum is young.o_O

    lisandro is growing on meeeeeeeee!

    i think out of all the matches, the bayern munich v manutd was the most intense; thus, my fave.:P

  12. Kleon says:

    I'm a bit angry about the 2-2 ¬.¬ But next match will be in Barcelona so big hopes!

    But it sucks that Cesc is injured… he shouldn't have played the second part I hope he will be healthy enough for the wc

  13. liv says:

    So glade Rooney injury is a minor one, Thanks heaven! If Bordeaux crash out of the Cl, and not meet Manchester(hopefully) in the semis that would be evil showing its face no ofense to Lyon and Beyern.Inter just might make it to the final this year; there is somethink different i can't put my finger on it. Arsenal vs Barca yesterday was a stunner although i care less about who won, draw or lost still enjoyed the game. keep it sexy out there boys, and don't forget taking your shirt off after you score is the best way to get a yellow card!

  14. DutchGooner says:

    seriously am very proud of my boys they stuck it out and got a draw…i really thought barcelona were gonna run riot…but thanks to great goalkeeping and luck and some magically moments from ourselves we managed to draw the game….

    but am absolutly devastated about CESCY hes out for the rest of the season am not happy 1 bit!!! Weve been very unfortunate with our players getting injured this season :( , hopefully we can end on a high…come on you gunners

  15. sounderslove says:

    Cesc :(

    When he got the yellow card that spelled suspension…oh god I almost died at how gutted he was. And now he's out for the season. Come on you gunners, make it to the CL final for Cesc!

  16. Molly says:

    Roo-roo is going to be okay!!! Thank god!!! :) Its only a minor injury.

  17. HJ says:

    ooh!Last night's game was on fire! we dominated the 1st half and proved to the world that we are the best club but then, Walcott came on in the 2nd half and things started slipping :(

    Cesc (was totally gorgeous but here goes): should stop being bitter about getting booked and missing next week's match because he won't be able to play anyway!Puyol's and Pique's tackles on him will see them out of the 2nd leg :( I hope our defence can stand strong.

    but who else fangirl-screamed when Pique slipped his arm around Cesc's waist and drove him to the ground?I had to fan myself!!

    • Ah me too! I love the Cesc/ Pique moments! Maybe Pique, Puyol & Cesc will all sit together at the Camp Nou and watch the match. Then they can comfort each other and maybe take their shirts off anyway…

  18. Homeskillet17 says:

    i do not believe that arsenal's penalty was a penalty. but no puyol no pique for the next game. still annoyed.

    • sounderslove says:

      maybe it was a soft pen, but his leg was broken. plus the yellow he got earlier in the match was no way a booking, and the ref was pretty terrible on all counts anyway.

      • Homeskillet17 says:

        ok, but i was talking about barca. i'm worried about they're situation at the back. i'm sorry for cesc, it sucks for anyone to get injured but my team is barca so i'm going to worry about them.

      • MrsNesta says:


    • Linda (Gooner till I die) says:

      My little brother who supports Chelsea said it was “revenge” for last year’s semifinal. :)

      • Winnie says:

        LMAO! i agreew with your brother!

        Barcelona (and this year Inter) cannotget away with what happened to Chelsea last year…

        they have been so terribly wronged!

  19. Alisha! says:

    Aww poor Cesc…at least he should only be out for 6 weeks! Cannot believe we drew 2-2 with Barca!!

  20. senora ramos says:

    harsh kickette :(

    horrible about cesc. possibly missing the wc as well with a broken fibula. cute pic of he and pique, though.

    and i don't see it with new guti. i guess the headband/blonde hair?!