April 7th, 2011

Champions League Results, Pt II: Who’s The Daddy?

Aww, baby. Image: AP Photo/Daylife

It’s part two of our marvelous Champions League Results round up, people. Strap yourself in, grab your hip flask and join us for the ride.

(Psst: there’s semi-nekkid Pique and everything!)

Chelsea 0-1 Manchester United

Really, Nando? Image: Reuters/Daylife.

There are few players in world football as capable of confounding expectation as Wayne Rooney (left). Last weekend, the world (or at least the part of it concerned with such matters) was recoiling in horror from the sight of his contorted features hurling abuse at them via their television. Last night, despite desperately struggling against it, we were thrilled by his goal scoring exploits on the Stamford Bridge pitch during United’s vital 1-0 first leg victory against Chelsea. Bah!

In the league, matches between these two can be cagey affairs, but both sides were clearly in the mood in this early stage, although the combination of Rooney and Javier Hernandez upfront for United looked far more threatening than the Drogba/Torres pairing tried by Chelsea.

This was born out after twenty four minutes, when Rooney struck from a well-rehearsed Carrick/Giggs build up. He celebrated with a big smile, which we found almost as unnerving as his angry face.

Image: Reuters/Daylife.

Torres had his moments, but luck just isn’t on the pretty one’s side right now. He had plenty of involvement in Chelsea’s repeated surges toward goal but the final touch just isn’t there. That bad luck seemed to spread throughout the side as they game progressed; the Blues had several chances cleared by an energetic Edwin van der Saar and were denied a clear penalty in the final stages, when Ramires was taken down by Patrice Evra in the area.

Of all the games in the quarters so far, this is the one that still has a realistic chance of an exciting finish. Roll on next Tuesday!


Barcelona 5-1 Shakhtar Donetsk

There are few things that can persuade us to forgive bad goal celebrations. This is one of them. Image: Reuters/Daylife.

A Spanish side win by a four goal margin in a game that could (if we weren’t being respectful to fans of the opposition) be described as a walkover? Hmm, we’re getting déjà vu here.

Like the Spurs before them, plucky Shakhtar Donetsk must have believed in the possibility that they could cause a huge upset. They had, after all, earned their place in the quarter finals of the Champions League. And for a good two minutes, we all believed as well. Then new daddy Andres Iniesta took advantage of a pass intended for David Villa and ruined it all.

It was at that point that the result was in the bag. Iniesta set up Dani Alves for Barca’s second; Gerard Pique, who is on something of a spree at the mo, scored from a deflection and proceeded to embarrass himself again with his dodgy goal celebration.

Image: Reuters/Daylife.

This was the only downside for Barca fans. Shakhtar were able to pull one back via Yaroslav Rakitskiy, but Keita and Xavi made certain with two more before putting one eye forward at their potential opponents in the semis: Real Madrid.

In case you haven’t worked it out, that’s potentially FOUR ‘El Classicos’ in the span of about two weeks. We can confirm there was a spike in mental health day requests from the Kickette staff when this news broke.

This was our view. Yours, please?

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82 Responses to “Champions League Results, Pt II: Who’s The Daddy?”

  1. Stefka says:

    "proceeded to embarrass himself again with his dodgy goal celebration" You sisters Kickette often leave me laughing on the floor……(he does look mighty good without the shirt)

  2. @DebStimson says:

    Dear Geri better slow down on his goal scoring or Pep may move him up to forward. lol He's a scoring machine!
    And Iniesta…tell me that man is not a CRACK! I had the hardest time finding a stream that didn't freeze or crap out. Finally got one from about the 15th to the 65th minute before I had to find another one. Ended up only missing Iniesta's first goal but still…grrr!

    One thing that I found quite interesting was Pep's celebration after Barca scores. It's VERY similar to what Marcelo did after Crouch was shown the 2nd yellow card. Remember the one that people thought was so "uncool"/"unprofessional", etc.? I just found it ironic that no one says anything about Pep's celebration, especially when he continued to do it for the 4th & 5th goals. I mean by that time the game was well over so doesn't it become "unprofessional" then? Just wondering.

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      True that! What about Iniesta yellow card too? or just when Alonso or Ramos or even Iker do it is unsporting, I am so pissed on UEFA for it. UEFA should apologize to us, these stuff happens in football, just because Mourinho is part of it it is called "unsporting".

    • Xavii says:

      How can you compare someone celebrating a goal made by your team, and a man celebrating/gloating that someone from the opposing team gets sent off? That's totally incomprehensible! Just because the pose was similar the situation was'nt. Pep was happy, Marcelo was gloating. It's just that simple.

      • Sarah, Madrid says:

        That's the thing, He was NOT gloating? he was celebrating a team advantage in a game? players getting sent-off, is like a player celebrating the fact that he get a penalty in a game, it is a game advantage, why would Marcelo gloat Crouch sending, whyyyyy? I could say pep was gloating by celebrating a goal for his club, you never know. I believe she has a point in this one, players do it all the time when a player get sent-off they celebrate, just because it is English club and media there over-read everything!

        • Xavii says:

          Because, celebrating a goal is something that you naturally do. It's the point of the game, alright? Isn't it? It would be unnatural, and a bit boring, if a coach didn't celebrate a goal. It is also a celebration of someones skill on the football field. The skill of scoring. On the other hand, to celebrate a players sending off is just to show your own lack of sportmansship. You celebrate a non-sport aspect of the game. Plus, you celebrate someone elses misfortune (even if they had done something bad to deserve it). It's just about good manners. Sometimes that's not so logical. That's why you teach your kids not to laugh when someone falls over, even if it did look funny. You can't always react instinctively. But I really think you are allowed to be happy, and show it, when your team scores.

          • @DebStimson says:

            " Plus, you celebrate someone elses misfortune"

            But celebrating a goal against another team is not celebrating someone's misfortune? The other team made mistakes which resulted in your team scoring.

            Of course you could say that it was Marcelo's skill & talent at being able to get to the ball first that caused Crouch to foul him which resulted in his 2nd yellow card/sending off. And the same could be said for Sergio & Crouch's first card. Both were clearly fouled during the run of play so how is that a "non-sport" aspect of the game?

            Now if Marcelo were cheering over someone getting hurt and thus no longer able to participate in the game, then yes, I would definitely agree that it was unsportsmanlike.

            The truth is you can spin just about any action by anyone to suit a particular purpose, just as you are spinning Pep's reaction to paint him in a better picture than Marcelo's. You are a Barca fan so it's normal for you to stick up for Pep and criticize Marcelo. I get it, really I do. But I am certain that if the situations were reversed, you'd view things just a bit differently.

            • Xavii says:

              Well if you don't know what good manners means, then there is little I can do to enlighten you. Your reasoning is really strange to me. How on earth can you criticize Pep for being happy when one of his players scores? It's absolutely beyond me. And I assure you it has nothing to do with me being a Barca fan (I'm actually more of a Villareal fan, but Xavi is my favourite). And believe me, if anyone of the Villareal players (or Barca players) celebrate someone being sent off, I will still call it ibad sportmanship. Because it is. And I just love it when coaches show their happiness after a goal! Like Ferguson does. And Mourinho. And Pep. It is so boring when they don't. Don't you think?

            • Sarah, Madrid says:

              You actually read my mind, I have noticed, not over-here much to be honest, kickette fans are understanding, but it seems like everything our club do, it has to sound unsporting, it is pissing me off, Mourinho come up with a statement he is rude, then some other coach or player come with the same statement, no he has the right to do so, it is his game. The double standard we are facing as a club, it is unbelievable.
              I dont like playing the victim, but it is true.

      • @DebStimson says:

        Well,,,both acts are celebrating an advantage for their team, no? Pep was celebrating goals after his team has clearly demolished their opponent and Marcelo celebrates the advantage of Crouch's 2 fouls that resulted in his sending off.

        How does one determine who is happy & who is gloating? Right…you can't, unless you're a mind reader. To the impartial viewer, both men seemed happy.

        But thank you, you proved my point. Different rules apply for judging actions by Barca coaches/players and that of Madrid's coaches/players.

        • lovito says:

          Omg seriously??!!

          If a Barca player were to cheer that the opposing team gets someone sent off, it would STILL be unsporting behaviour and it IS cheering on someone's misfortune. And that is in bad taste. I'm a Barca fan and I would still think that way if it was a Barca player doing that! Of cos, I would feel relieved that my team now has an extra advantage but I wouldn't so blinded and warped to think it's not unsporting at all.

          And what's the objective of a football game? Isn't it to score goals? That's how u win a football game. So how is CELEBRATING your team scoring in the same category as "celebrating when the opposing team gets a man down"??

          If the opposing team wins, the opposing team coach and fans can celebrate for all they want! It's their right! Sure, them scoring means bad news to my team but it's their right to celebrate! Because the whole point of football is to score goals and win! If people don't celebrate wins, then what's the point of competitions??? Sheesh!

          I'm just speechless by your extremely twisted reasoning. Maybe you'll do better without the whole 'we're so victimized' mindset. Granted, having Mou as your coach makes Madrid even more prone to controversial reporting about their club and players and actions, but try to remain sensible ok?

          • Sarah, Madrid says:

            Yes because we have Mourinho and Ronaldo plays for us and we are Real Madrid, the club who likes spending money, we are not treated fairly. I as a Madrid fan, not long ago I would have laughed at my fellow madridista when they used to say it, but now I am starting to believe it day by day, it is a fact. Not because we have Mourinho, because we are a combination of different elements that piss people off, as far as I remember, I dont hear this much from Inter and Chelesa when Mourinho used to be there. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjHFJmffPeY

            Shall I call this unsporting or smart because as far I remember, when we did it in the UCL, the whole football world called us cheater, unsporting behaviour, but when you did it, actually no-one even noticed, btw there is another image of Pep instructing them to do so, yeah I have the right to feel like the under-dog. ( I understand it is different competition, but it is the same game).

  3. Zippity says:

    Awwww, that's so sweet to see Torres and Ferdinand making friends! Gee, I had no idea Pique was hiding that under his shirt-what a beautiful man!

  4. Rezia says:

    I have only one thing to say. It is this: Pique must never, NEVER, be allowed to wear a shirt. I'm pretty sure that torso might have a role to play in establishing worl peace forever.

  5. Maria says:

    I completely understand you. May I also say this? Nando, please fix your hair, or else stalkers will have to start creeping around you with a pair of scissors and a comb. And yes, I will be a part of them.

  6. Zahara says:

    i am going to invade geri piques home and steal all his clothes..then hell walk around like that for SURE.
    god bless him and sexiness.

    good job, my lovely barca boys! go win the champions league!
    but also, nice work shaktar boys!

    my god, pique, i just cant get you outta my head

  7. Zahara says:

    i am going to invade geri piques home and steal all his clothes..then hell walk around like that for SURE.
    god bless his sexiness.and him

    yay!barca!i love you!lets go and win the champions league!woohoo!

    ps, good show, shakhtar boys

  8. FloraJane says:

    There's not much I hate more than watching Chelsea play Man United. I know there's always going to be controversy. I'm not suprised by the scoreline, but I expected it to be the other way around or either 1-1. Oh wait- it should have been 1-1. Like Frank said, "Everyone knows it was a penalty, but it wasn't given. Simple as that." Oh well, like John said "..expect nothing from anyone." That should be our motto in the Champions League. I'd laugh about it if I could. But Chelsea always seem to do well when they've been wronged, or when everything seems against us, so perhaps this will work in our favour. If Chelsea can beat their arrogant arses at Old Trafford next week then it will be all the sweeter.

    Oh, and holy Barcelona! That was crazy! And I must admit to feeling really sorry for Spurs, too. I wanted better for Harry.

  9. Marie says:

    The Barca game was amazing and Xavi scoring was the icing on the cake. But for me Pep stole the show, he was in his element with all those mad gestures and celebrations and simply being Pep, you've gotta love him!

  10. Raz says:

    omg i am so happy for iniesta! it seems he'll make a great daddy :) i cant wait to see the precious girl, wonder if she'll have iniesta's baby face??? i hope so :) and it is so great that he scored a goal the first match after her birth and could dedicate it to her

  11. Raz says:

    wow look how good pique looks. I really need to stop changing channels so quickly after FCB games ;) two goals in two games-he is on the ball recently!

  12. Zahara says:

    BARCAAAAA!i love youu!lets win the champions league!

    i am going to invade geri piques closet and steal all his shirts and jackets and whatever nonsense he wears over that amazing body.

    he should just walk like that.seriously, and god bless his sexiness.

    my jaw literally dropped when i saw that pic.

  13. MsMe says:

    Oh dear, how I love Gerard. He is dorky in such a sweet way. I guess I have to get me a Pique-voodoo doll. I don´t know any other way to get him.

  14. Anthea says:

    Piquè's celebration is for him and Shakira: they both were born on february the 2nd! :-) So 2 and 2!

    Abidal has already returned to training field, it's not for him anymore.

  15. Mini says:

    Pique's goal celebration is for Abidal (#22) so it's actuallu really sweet.

  16. Tiggertoo says:

    That will be 5 El Clasicos if you count the supercopa usually La Liga winners against Copa runner ups. Although i'm a proud madridista i'm very nervous because our team seems to be unstable one day we play like our life is on the line and others we play like we forgot what football is. I'm not going to put all my energy into expecting something special however I hope they can learn from their mistake last November and show the fans they deserve that trophy May 28th at the Wembley i'd rather them lose a La Liga match then lose at CL or Copa. I feel bad for them what a brutal few weeks it will be can't imagine how tired they will be after each game. Anyways good luck to all the teams still in the running, may the best team win.

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      You know we have Bilboa, tottenham, classico, CDR – classico, Valencia, if we qualify another classico. I cant even breathe thinking about that. I am just like you, as painful as losing in Bernabeu three years in row, I rather win CDR and UCL place before anything. We look better at European level because it is Jose area, however in Liga he is stil finding path, which is very understandable and we are not struggling that much, we are just facing a club whose key players has been together for 5 years with the same coach in three years now, same players, same system, we should give ourself some credit I would say.
      The good thing is: I think, for the first time in beginning of the season, we have a full squad, with no-one injured so far, – thank god! – I am crossing fingers kaka will play games of his life beside Oh-zeil, Cris, Benz, Angel and Pipa.

  17. balicious says:

    is it me or Pique is gettin hotter?

  18. Stefania says:

    What is Fernando mad about? Haha! And all I can say about Pique is WOW what a hottie!!!!! Im so happy for Andres and Ana and their new little baby, can't wait to see her!

  19. bri_saldana says:

    Bale was phenomenal despite the circumstances..

  20. Sarah, Madrid says:

    He dived, he asked for a penalty, then the referee gave him a yellow! Now, why did he push rio, maybe because he called him for it, I dont know?

    • beri says:

      Rio probably told Nando… #stayonyour feet …lol!

      btw…anyone who follows Ferdy on twitter knows what I'm talking about…haha!

  21. mochara says:

    Nando!! *gasp* Mmmmmmm Pique….. i've now recovered ^_^

  22. JA7 says:

    This is why i LOVE football..with toned bodies like pique's walking the fields..damn lost my train of thought

  23. Lily says:

    I am so down for that Yoga session!!!! You got my vote!

  24. Leya_S says:

    ManU-Chelsea appear to be the slackers, as their game only ended with 1 goal between them (j/k, but seriously, there was INSANE goal scoring in all the other games!!)
    Iniesta's goal celebration for his daughter was adorable.
    Gerard Pique with no shirt….LOVE. He's wayyy too hot, I can't handle it.
    P.S. Anyone know what day [the first upcoming] El Clasico actually is? ESPN keeps saying the 16th, but both Barca and RM websites say the 17th….

    • Susana says:

      United and Chelsea have very strong defenses, so the 1-0 was not a surprise.

      Ashley Cole looks like a first-grader next to Rio.

      and to Nando…"stay on your feet!"

      • beri says:

        finally! someone who knows about the "stay on your feet" movement… lol!

        I bet when Rio helped Torres up the first time (you know when Torres found himself in the middle of a Rio/Vidic sandwich) that he said to him "stay on your feet"…

        btw…I agree Ashley Cole looks like a young'un next to Rio…poor thing not everyone gets the gift of height!

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      The classico is on Saturday 16, @ 18:00 CET :)

  25. Gladys says:

    You deserve an ambassadorship for that suggestion!

  26. gin_in_teacups says:

    Oh dear lord, my liver will not stand up to the amount of drinking I will have to do if there are that many clasicos in such a short period of time.

  27. Lotte says:

    Xavi's hair was a highlight, I totally agree. So much better. As if he needed to be more irresistable…

    • Pique_Xavi says:

      No surprise I agree with you. I love whenever he gets his hair cut. I looooove his hair without gel, he gets these adorable waves……. he seems to be all smiles in recent weeks. I'm think he has a gal or someone in his life who will soon be part of the new WAGs club. I kind of want to see him with someone already.

      • Lotte says:

        I want to see him with a gal and a bunch of mini Xavi's. Just how adorable would they be, with those eyes and that hair?

        • Pique_Xavi says:

          Yes Xavitos…. they could be blonde or dark hair bubbas……. :) But I hope it happens soon, lol If he doesn't have babies before he retires I doubt we will see pics of them. In Terrassa I would think they will respect his wishes for privacy. I do hope to see a little mini Xavi with his hair all spiky like his daddy wearing a little black jacket *dies*

  28. Pandora says:

    Both of my favourite teams won yesterday but all I can think about is Gerard "I absolutely adore" Pique. And, of course I don't want to admit his celebration was for Shakira . It was for Abidal. Second time this week. Yeah, right. :P
    He just needs to continue scoring and walking shirtless around after match and I will be happy . :D
    I'm also very happy about Real Madrid because we will see 4 el classicos in a short time, I won't sleep that period, it's like superbowl for me :D
    Champions league is almost over, I want to enjoy every game especially grande finale between my United and my Barcelona <3

    • Pique_Xavi says:

      I want this too real bad. I want to see Chicharito against Messi and Xavi. Even though I'm not a fan of either club I love watching Barca win and I do enjoy watching Chicharito score. But what I truly do love about all this aside from Xavilicious scoring and having a new haircut and looking good is that anyone seems to be able to score in this awesome team that is Barca… :)

  29. Sarah, Madrid says:

    Well, yes what is the word to describe this April for us Madrid vs Barc fans? Nerve-wracking, manic,insanity, bitch-faces, slaps…in other words; DRAMA. I am personally hating this. However, the good thing, the stressing out will make me lose the winter weight in the right time to hit the beaches ^_^

  30. Jen says:

    What a first leg!!!!! All the goals, all the drama. It was great!! I especially like how Nando got pissed at Man U for helping him up after his DIVE!!!! Am over him thankfully!! Really really impressed by Schalke, and feel that Shaktar never had a chance with drawing Barca.
    Looking forward to the next leg……

  31. freckles-of-nando says:

    Can we discuss the unfortunate situation that is Fernando's headband? Really, does he need that? He looks 394373 times better without it. Just saying…

    The matches: As a Liverpool fan, I'm supposed to be hating on Manchester United (but it's really more indifference on my part) and ever since the whole transfer saga, Chelsea and I aren't exactly on good terms. As for Nando, I hear he was practicing some diving yesterday. *Shakes head in disapproval* Please stop, my dear.
    And Barcelona, well everyone knew they were going to demolish Shaktar, so no surprise there. But hey, it seems like we're going to have 4 more El Clasicos this season!!

    • Jen says:

      I felt the same about the Man U/Chelsea clash yesterday…..indifferent, and still a little heartbroken by Nando.

    • Homeskillet07 says:

      everyone but Barca fans tbh…lol. on twitter so many of us were pretty much nervous wrecks, especially after what Pep said. :)

  32. Summer says:

    Happiness and luck things that I don't know. Incredible, impossible, unbelievable for me. I'm not angry (this is the lightest thing), but disappointed, so much disappointed. In my eyes there are still now images of the match, and I don't know if i will be able to forget and also to forgive. It was better for me to not see the match, not think about it and dream an illusion, as I have always done. I don't know if my Chelsea will pass now, I don't know if I have to hope, to be confident, and hope in a few luck. I got a 9, an excellent in a test today, but it was strange, and I wasn't happy. I'm afraid of the future for Chelsea (and this is for me the first time), but there' s a part of me that says, and remember me Seneca's words: "So many times, by now, you've suffered the assault of the destiny; but you've never surrendered, but you've jumped to one's feet and you've resisted with a greater firmness: value when is defied multiplies". But I've decided at the end of the game that I will take J. for me (One of the few good things that I saw)

  33. Bri says:

    Mental health days? Try a mental health month! I am exploding with anticipation of the Classicos!!!! Visca Barca!!! I am not going to be very productive for a looooong time….

    • Lily says:

      Tell me about it, as a Madrid fan I am still recovering from the last Classico.

      More rounds of yoga for me this month.

      Hala Madrid!!!!!

  34. Dar says:

    I love Barca but a little part of me wanted Shakhtar to win. I guess I have a soft side for underdogs, and Romanians.
    Now for more important issues, seeing Pique shirtless just made my day. God bless him and his hot body.

  35. Por dior says:

    I don´t know if my heart is prepared for four "Clasicos" …. i´m still recovering from the last one .

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      This is unhealthy for us, I as a Madrid fan, I am already feeling the stress, I dont think I can survive this :(

      • Por dior says:

        usually el clasico is a stressfull match , that starts a week before the game and ends a week after , but this time is worse there is alot at stake,champions ,copa del rey ,which means more stress .
        I´m worried about the health of older fans, don´t know if they can take it .

        • Sarah, Madrid says:

          Agree! For that we should, need to perpare for the worse, if the qualification confirmed it will be 4 in week, 7 in 2011!! I am not sure if it should called classico anymore lol.

  36. Irena says:

    Kickette, it becomes Los Clasicos! and yes FOUR wtafncomcewp!

  37. IrishBlue says:

    Yesterday was going so well for me, then the Chelsea-Man Utd match came on………FRUSTRATION!!!!! It's not easy being a Chelsea fan these days, seeing mediocre/poor performances week on week is not doing anything for my general happiness, pick it up lads, before I go insane. Cech, you save our asses so often, thank St. Iker we have you!

    Nando?????????????????????? Please just put the ball in the net!!!!!!!!!!! I'm sure the pressure piled on top of him must be horrendous though, so I do feel some sympathy for the poor thing :(

    Oh my god Pique, I feel a bit weak after that…..wow.

  38. Devilish-x says:

    I just can't help but wonder how lucky Torres was to get sandwiched between Rio AND Vida in the first half..
    Yes I admit, it should have been a penalty. But my united lads did play really well, so fingers crossed for the 2nd leg!
    And sheeeeesh.. A possible El Classiso semi-final? :O

  39. blake2108 says:

    Shakira is one hell of a lucky lady to be able to get her mitts on that body…

  40. hereforthenando says:

    Isn't Pique's goal celebration in honour of Abidal, who's number 22? That's what I thought…

    Fernando's bitchface was on fire last night. As much as him and I aren't on the best of terms (I'm still hurt, and he continues to pretend like he doesn't know who I am), I just want him to score already. I feel sorry for him more than anything else.

  41. nandosfreckles says:

    Sorry, but who won what, where,when???
    I seem to have forgotten everything after seeing Pique shirtless.

  42. Gladys says:

    Though I was so glad for Barca, I just want to say that Shakhtar played a great game (didn't park the bus, drove forward with speed, made attempts on goal, and were not at all weak). So, out of deference to sweet Darijo, the gorgeous Romanian Rat (that's his last name), and all those talented Brazilians, though the score may seem like they were walked over, they really weren't. It was an exciting and challenging game (our defenders and midfield scored, our strikers defended). And so happy for new dad Don Andres– he was MOTM. Wish there weren't now four (is it 5?) El Clasicos… not cause of RM in particular, just because it's boring to play the same team so many times. Oh well.

    P.S. Can someone please explain what Nando is doing in that picture? It almost looks like he's giving Rio a yellow card. LOL.

    • B&W@kickette.com says:

      LOL. It is the Referee giving him a yellow after diving on the ground for no reason! Rio was helping him up and he got all bitch face dramatic about it!

    • Cait says:

      LOL @ Romanian Rat

      • Gladys says:

        Funny enough, he is Romanian and his last name is actually Rat. Maybe I should have written Rastvan Rat, so it didn't sound so bad. :)