Dearest readers, we love our lively bunch here on Kickette. You are insightful, hilariously snarky, full of footy knowledge and all round lot of classy ladies. We are proud to have you as part of our army.

But enough of the sweet talk; we need to remind everyone of the house rules.

While we understand how easy it is to let your team loyalties and national pride get the best of you every now and again, we don’t want any of our readers being pegged as ‘that drunk girl’ at the party. See, we’re always looking out for our biggest fans.

Kickette Zero tolerance policy (aka How To Get Banned faster than you can say Bitchface):

1. Improper Language. We keep our swears at about the PG+13 level (aka, WTF? Holy eff! Etc). Please do the same. For example – addressing fellow posters with synonyms for lady bits and/or man bits will earn you an instant ban. And yes, you will get banned even if you remove the vowels. And no, it doesn’t make it any less rude.

2. Disrespectful behaviour. We try to snark with a touch of discretion, please do the same with others in the comments section. We welcome lively debates and good natured sarcasm, but personal attacks, racist, homophobic, sexist comments or insults based on anyone’s religion, national or ethnic background, hate speech and anything generally icky and defamatory directed towards someone else will be deleted. And you will be banned.

3. Bullying will not be tolerated. Giggling, ogling half naked footballers and fan-girling aside – this is not junior high. It wasn’t cool then, it’s not cool now. Also, talking smack about Kickette in our own house usually doesn’t go down well. Just sayin’.

4. Repeated abuse of the comment section. This includes: inability to stay on topic, inciting polarising debates for the sole purpose of exchanging back-and-forth insults and all around jackassery. Think before you type.

5. Do not spam. We do not need acai berries/help meeting singles/an online university degree.

6. Mean comments about children are off limits. Regardless who his/hers parents might be. This is our stern ‘use your coaster’ warning as we love our mums dearly.

7. Posters using fake IP addresses and/or fake emails will be banned.

Concerned about a comment someone has made? Click the “report this comment” button and let us know.

And, just some general guidelines…

1. Can we try to avoid text speak? It gives us the stabbies.

2. Ignore the trolls unless they have wildly-coloured hair and jewelled belly buttons. If you don’t know/are not sure you are dealing with a troll, read about trolls here.

3. Dying to go off topic or chat about your wild weekend? We totes get it. Just take it over to the community and exchange gory details there please.

3. We will remove any content that might put us in legal jeopardy by being potentially libellous, defamatory or if material is posted that might be in potential breach of copyright. Why? a) we do not like being contacted by angry lawyers, b) we like to have some shoe shopping money and c)  we do not want to go to jail. Laundry room would give us frizzy hair. And that would, again, give us the stabbies.

4. All comments are solely the opinions of the individuals submitting them and the publication of them on does not imply endorsement or agreement by us.

5. All of the above are defined at our discretion. We reserve the right to prohibit all comments, to delete or edit all or any portion of any comment made, and to ban any commenter or IP address from making any comments to this blog.